#idk why he’s even involved but there seems to be a lot about him here
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sacredshadow · 1 year ago
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Greed! 😮 with SliskexAzzyxZemouregal :^) ahehe~
SINDAY HEADCANONS
😮 Do they feel like they own someone? Their partner, their friends...
(This one does touch on some sexual stuff btw)
Interesting that you mention Zemouregal. Did you hack into my brain and see my headcanons about that?
So I guess we're going to start by addressing the elephant in the room, after I explain to Zemouregal that it's just a thing people say and has nothing to do with the fact that he's big and has grey skin.
First of all, I am not a Zemouregal roleplay blog. Keep that in mind please.
I have previously mentioned that there used to be something between Azzanadra and Zemouregal back on Freneskae, and it's odd that this is coming up now since that was one of the main reasons it didn't work out. It only lasted a few months, three Rituals of Enervation. After the second one in that period, Zemouregal started to assume that because he had managed to make Azzanadra be submissive for him, he had the right to treat him like a pet and show him off to his friends like "Hey look, I've got someone who ranks substantially higher in the tribe as my partner, and, as I'm sure you all saw, it was ME on top at the last ritual!"
It was really quite embarrassing for Azzanadra and not how he had wanted it to go, and Zemouregal was quite annoyed at how annoyed Azzanadra was with his possessiveness, and there was a bit of jealousy since Azzanadra was still preferring to spend time and share a sleeping spot with Sliske, which in turn led to more possessiveness and more annoyance. It did not go well.
Although this may have set things up as "oh, Azzanadra doesn't like it when someone says he belongs to them", he has a ring from Sliske with an engraving that reads “This Mahjarrat is property of Sliske”. Sliske definitely considers Azzanadra to be ‘his’, but it’s more of a cute romantic thing most of the time. He will sometimes say things along the lines of “You’re mine, I can do whatever I like to you” in sexual scenarios, which Azzanadra will usually be into if he’s in the right mood.
Azzanadra does sometimes say similar things, but many studies have been done and they have all found that it is impossible for someone to ‘own’ Sliske.
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telephoniii · 2 months ago
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hello!! idk if you accept requests, but i randomly thought of octavinelle trio with a reader who's also from the sea like them and on land they're a total sweetheart, upbeat and doesn't give off the vibe of scariness at all, but the trio know that they're actually pretty scary! Cuz back in the sea they were an orca or something (like. sweet but theyre actually scary is my vision) if the octotrio is too much then is just floyd ok?? Sorry for yapping too much AHHH ur work is so great ty for writing so much 🙏🙏
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THE DEVIL IN DISGUISE
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☆彡 in which you’re scarier than you seem
word counter: 180 per character
octavinelle boys x gn!reader
warnings: possible ooc, light bullying? (jade & floyd)
a/n: i love these boys, but they’re all pricks. lovable pricks. on another note, i think i’m going to officially open requests. i have a few that i’m working on and i’ve been having a lot of fun with them. they’re also nice for when it gets busy and I don’t have a lot of time to brainstorm ideas to write myself. anyway, i hope you enjoy :>
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floyd leech
He thinks you are the CUTEST thing in existence. You're so fun! So squeezable! Floyd thinks that your switch in personality from land to sea only adds to how adorable you are. He is fully aware of your scary side, yet it only motivates him to tease and mock you more. On land, he'll try to sneak up behind you in the hallways. If you don't catch this man? He's picking you up, squeezing you, and twirling you around. Azul has told him to stop several times. Jade just wants to see you snap at Floyd, so he never interferes. If you do catch and stop him? He's pouting for the rest of the day while plotting his revenge. Everyone's going to assume Floyd's just picking on the helpless classmate who's too nice to do anything back. But he knows it's a facade. Which is exactly why he goes harder on you than anyone else. Riddle is PRAYING for you.
jade leech
You and him are similar in a way. Except he hides his true nature less well. Jade is quick to catch on and finds it extremely amusing. He wants to see how far this act of yours will hold up, meaning he's purposely putting you in situations that'd aggravate you. All while he wears an innocent smile. He takes up the role of a devil on your shoulder in a way. Jade is constantly trying to tempt you into revealing more and more of your scary side in front of others. Calling him out on this won't do you much good either since he's playing a similar game to you. He'll just give you that dashing smile of his and claim he has no idea what you're referring to. If you get caught up in trouble with other students, run out of your land potion way too quickly, get involved in an argument, etc, more often than not you'll find Jade somewhere nearby smiling at you. And something about that grin tells you he defiantly pulled some strings to make your life just a little bit harder.
azul ashengrotto
He's the only one out of the three who's slightly intimidated by you. But even then, it's less fear and more intrigue. Azul wants to pick your brain. Do you switch from sweet to scary on purpose? If so, why? What're you trying to gain from doing so? He'll do little things to let you know that he's well aware of your true nature. It won't be anything drastic like Jade, just little, snide comments here and there with a smug look. Azul has offered you so many job opportunities at the Monstro Lounge. A personality like yours is way too good for business. He actually holds you to a pretty high regard and isn't afraid to tell you that, calling you his 'star pupil' when you work for him. Azul tries to be close to you a lot. Is he plotting to make a deal with you? Most likely. He's trying to get your guard down so you're more likely to agree to whatever he wants to do with you. Your unique personality could be a great Joker card if he ever needs it.
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gatorbites-imagines · 1 year ago
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Hiya I saw your requests were open so I was wondering if we can get a Tim Drake x male reader
The reader is a bigger older guy, like not too older than Tim but reader does have a streak of gray hair due to the stress of taking care of Bruce's dumbass.
Reader is kinda sly and fox like.
Idk why but I can see Tim liking someone older than him
Tim Drake x older male reader
Headcanons
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I feel like tumblr has been deleting requests from my inbox, I swear some go missing. This one didn’t though, so here you go.
It’s been a while huh? Who’d have thought getting ready to graduate would be so stressful.
Reader is about Dicks age, so around 26.
You didn’t meet through hero work or anything like that. You were actually the CEO of a larger company called Aces co. It had been in your family for many years, and your father and grandfather had worked with the Waynes.
So, when you took over at 18, you started working with Bruce Wayne, even though you thought him nothing much more than a himbo at the time. Later, when Tim took over, you’d work side by side with the younger man.
One way or another, you learn Bruces secret identity, and soon you end up mixed up in the vibrant and extremely stressful world that is heroes and vigilantes, you’ve lost count how many times you have had to cover for any of the batclan.
You almost burst into tears when you see the first grey hairs appear at your temples. Your father had gone grey much later in life, and here you were, 24 and greying, all because of the bats. Of course, it wasn’t all the bats, running a billion-dollar company was stressful too, but they sure didn’t help.
The media called you the fox prince, because of the sharp look in your eyes and how sly and underhanded you could be, insulting someone straight to their face and they would first realize days later. Or somehow tricking someone into revealing all their secrets to you.
None of the bats can ever seem to reach your level of mingling and information gathering, even Bruce who has been doing it longer than you’ve been alive.
You never become a hero, or a vigilante for that matter, but you do get involved every now and then if needed. You didn’t take over Aces co. for no reason at 18, you have always been a genius, but a sly and cruel one in the eyes of many.
Unlike Bruce, you don’t feel a soul deep duty to save the world and save as many people as possible. You simply do what you can, without putting yourself in too much danger. Which mainly resolves to you gathering too much information, and enough blackmail to have the entire congress of America and the EU buckling under for your whims.
You are an extremely cold and calculated businessman as well, to the point where underhanded companies like Lexcorps won’t work with you because they know you’ll rip them apart and leave them with nothing.
It was your cruel but very effective business methods that drew Tim to you, especially when it turned out you were a lot more friendly behind closed doors. He did get to hear you complain about him and his family a lot, and it gave him a good laugh to see Bruce open a bill for your hair treatments to get rid of your greys.
The alliance between Wayne enterprises and Aces Co. only grows stronger between you two, and you end up closer to Tim than you’ve been any other bat, even Dick, despite the fact that you two are the same age and have been around each other the longest.
It ends with you going out of your way to score the best deals for (Tim) Wayne Enterprises, and Tim finds ways to benefit (you) Aces Co. Its like flirting and foreplay at the same time between very powerful rich businessmen.
For some reason I can imagine most of the batfam is shocked when Tim and you started dating, whilst some of them aren’t surprised at all. Bruce is uncomfortable in the beginning that one of his former business partners is dating his son, until someone (most likely Jason) points out that you aren’t even 30 yet and took over your company the moment you turned 18.
Your relationship is kept a secret for the media, mainly to keep the drama and paparazzi away. You aren’t a very publicly affectionate person, and Tim doesn’t really like mingling with the media if he doesn’t have too, so it’s a win-win.
The two of you don’t go out of your way to be super secretive though, you just aren’t all lovey dovey all over each other. Some people may notice you getting a lot crueler and colder to those trying to cross Wayne Enterprises, and Tim striking down hard on anyone who tries Aces Co.
It’s assumed it’s just cuz you two are both young CEOs who are trying to strengthen the relationship between your companies. All your mutual friends and families knows its cuz you are both protective and a little possessive.
You are most likely the one in the relationship with the most experience since Tim has spent most of his time being a vigilante, so you’ll have to guide him in the beginning. He’s a great and enthusiastic learner though, so Tim probably ends up doing all kinds of research.
He lovingly calls you his old man, or jokingly calls you a cradle-snatcher, since you look older than you actually are cuz of your greys. It probably causes some drama online when your relationship finally gets out, until people are like “He’s literally only 26, he’s just greying early”.
Tim will comfort you when you end up with your face in your hands because of those comments, weeping for your once beautiful and not grey streaked hair. He loves it though, and always tells you.
You tell Tim he likes it cuz of his daddy issues, and he ends up being all “maybe so”. Doesn’t stop him from loving it though, or loving to see that foxlike glint appear in your eyes when you are about to strike on a deal.
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razberrypuck · 1 year ago
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something about kinger being in the circus "the longest" and him still openly caring about the other members and striving to be kind to them makes me emotional actually.
like yes the scene where he comforts ragatha but also the "pomni, take this" scenes. putting a bucket on ragatha's head after jax's licorice-hair comment -- said in front of a monster that eats candy people. winning rock-paper-scissors and being so excited to get to help zooble. remarking "oh, thank GOD you're okay," when zooble gets ejected from the gloink queen. he can be a great source of comfort in his moments of lucidity, but even when he's not quite there, he really does try his best to protect his friends -- even if his efforts come across as goofy or nonsensical.
I find it especially interesting that these moments are really the only times he actively involves himself in the adventures. yes he makes a few comments here and there, but when he isn't trying to help someone, he tends to just let things happen around him. he's largely absent in most of episode one (mostly because he seems to be freaking out about his own safety -- and granted, we don't know whether or not he was just having an especially bad day, but I think it's worth noting) and he doesn't get involved with the adventure at all until he's told to find zooble. he's also shown to be very observant of the people around him, like how he accurately predicted that kaufmo had completely lost it, when no one else picked up on the signs.
more than anything, though, I think kinger's conversation with ragatha shows some of his philosophy when it comes to the other players. "it's a lot for anybody to go through; don't take it too personally," is likely a learned sentiment -- and consciously or not, I think he doesn't have any bad blood with the other members (see: kinger being the only one (from what we've seen so far) that jax doesn't actively torment) because he understands why they act the way they do and doesn't hold it against them. everyone copes differently, and like I said before, he's very observant, especially when it comes to the emotions of others.
and idk. I just think it's nice the longest standing member of the circus didn't survive this long by learning not to care.
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sun-undone · 6 months ago
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okay so i'm rereading the poppy war for the sole purpose of trying to squeeze all the chaltan content i can get out of it and my god is it delivering already
this first one is something that i completely breezed past in my first reading cause i didn't even know who tf chaghan was yet but on a reread????? GAY (pg. 226):
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you're telling me that chaghan and altan just happened to be together when chaghan felt tyr's death? in the middle of the night??? mmhmm yup for sure
now as willing as i am to fully chalk this up to a late night chaltan tryst, i will be fair and admit that i'm not super clear on how exactly chaghan got the tyr info here. it kinda seems like he's doing his monthly meeting with the hexagram goddess (in the dialogue he literally says "there has been a hexagram" and then he interprets 3 things from it), but first off, it seems too coincidental for him to just happen to be doing that at the very moment that tyr dies, and also why tf is he doing it in the middle of the night?? is he just being extra dramatic and making up some "we have to do it at midnight" bullshit to see what he can get away with (a la the infamous kitay horse piss incident) or is there an in universe explanation for that that i've completely forgotten?
OR is it a secret, gayer third option: altan and chaghan were already together when he felt tyr's death, which then prompted him to convene with the goddess and get the hexagram. and we just don't see the full process or really get much of a proper explanation cause we're in altan's pov and it's all mysterious and shit at this point in the book. that's the one i'm going with and i cannot believe that this is their first scene together. the intimacy is already so palpable and we don't even know chaghan's name at this point in the book.
and then of course there's THIS (pg. 227):
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absolutely fucking bonkers i'm spinning on my head
is anyone else this gentle with altan ever????? i'm genuinely asking. who else in the cike would even THINK about pulling a move like this? also the added layer of chaghan originally being next in line for commander before altan took him out to the fucking valley for THREE WHOLE DAYS and then THIS is his reaction to altan officially inheriting said title??? we know from a later conversation that chaghan has with rin (pg. 337) that he's very aware of how unprepared altan was to assume leadership over the cike, which just makes this gesture from him even more meaningful and tender. "we are yours to command. i am yours."
this next one just made me giggle and idk if it's just my brain being broken from scouring source material for gay crumbs or if it's actually intentional but (pg. 285):
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i mean. i mean. if anyone knows the extent of chaltan, it's most definitely qara, and a lot of these crumbs involve her so i'm taking it as more evidence and no one can stop me
speaking of qara being an icon (pg. 317):
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i actually forgot how much she's in this book i am so sorry queen
so unegen also has a strong reaction to ramsa's dialogue, but if i may be incredibly nitpicky about it, i'd argue that qara snorting implies a sense of "yeah right now that's funny", while unegen spitting out his wine implies more pure shock than anything else. i'm sure the cike have some idea about chaghan and altan's relationship going deeper than meets the eye (if it's this obvious from the crumbs we get over the span of a handful of scenes i can only imagine how sick and tired they must be after an entire year of it), but once again, qara is likely the only one who really KNOWS. for obvious reasons.
then we have the iconic dramatic entrance where chaghan is officially introduced, and even before zooming into a specific piece of it to prove my chaltan agenda, just the very existence of this scene is so fucking insane to me. rebecca could've chosen any way to properly introduce us to chaghan, and this is what she decided on. you could argue that it sets up chaghan's dramatic and obnoxiously proud personality, and that him being hurt is so we can see how it affects qara (and also just to up the tension and stakes) BUT how coincidental that on top of achieving all that character and narrative stuff, it also succeeds in showing us a completely different side to altan. one that is specifically brought about by chaghan.
would altan rush out into a sea of federation soldiers to help any other member of the cike? yes. but rebecca chose to show him helping THIS member of the cike. in THIS dramatic of a fashion (and it's literally on a horse like that is so fractured fairytale romance of her actually). and it's also the aftermath that really clues us into something deeper between him and chaghan in particular (pg. 373):
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along with qara, who is SOUL BONDED TO CHAGHAN BY THE WAY, altan is screaming at him for being reckless and how he could've gotten himself killed. intentionally or not, rebecca is clearly aligning altan and qara here, and i LOVE how it's shown in the way their dialogue is formatted. you don't even know who is saying which fragment. they are one in the same when it comes to the level in which they care about chaghan's wellbeing. and also when it comes to yelling at him for being an idiot! and if that's not love then idk what is
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psychickiss · 1 year ago
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my solace is you
— saiki kusuo x reader (gn, 2nd pov)
— summary: Kusuo can’t sleep, and you just want to be there for him.
— notes: hey so it is like 11pm for me rn. idk i wrote this on a whim to get me away from writers block and to help me like. write away my feelings... ew...
— things: established. something! LOL.. ok. platonic or romantic, depends on you!
masterlist | request form | retrospring
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It is quite... hard, being involved with a psychic.
Saiki Kusuo.
He knows what you’re thinking 24/7—while you can’t even seem to get a word out of him.
You can’t blame him for that, of course. It’s not like he popped out of his mother demanding for every power in the world.
Although, it’s a funny thought. A cartoonish one, at that.
“It is a funny thought.”
You jumped in your seat. It was 10 PM, and you’re supposed to be alone. Plus, your house was relatively far from Kusuo. So, how–?
“I teleported.”
You frown at him. “Right, and—hey! At least let me pretend you’re not involuntarily listening to my thoughts.” You’re quiet as Kusuo takes up space on your bed. You move a little so he’s more comfortable.
“So, what brings you here?”
Kusuo doesn’t look at you when he answers, “I couldn’t sleep.”
You hum in response. “I thought you had that little–well, not little–unoccupied and undiscovered space here on Earth that’s specifically yours. Can’t you, I don’t know, try to... I don’t know.”
But, it’s not like you think Kusuo isn’t a human. Kusuo just happens to be a human with powers.
“Because it is very comfy, being surrounded by solid rocks with bugs underneath them.” Kusuo shivers at the mention of the small creatures. You can’t help but laugh at him.
It is moments like this that keeps you grounded on the fact that Kusuo is... just like you. He is human. He is a teenager like you, experiencing relatively normal teenage problems. Say, having to use your psychic superpowers to avoid a girl that had feelings for you that you didn’t reciprocate; totally average! If you took out the powers part.
“I can’t read your mind, you know?”
Kusuo looks at you, though he doesn’t turn to actually face you. “I know that.”
“So,” you ask, “why did you teleport all the way here if you couldn’t sleep?”
Kusuo looks to the other side. “I just thought you might still be awake.”
He turns to face you, then you reply, “I guess it’s a good thing that I am.” You smile at him. “I was just thinking about you, you know?”
“I know.”
“I know that you know... And... I also want to know what you’re thinking.”
You notice Kusuo’s lips curve downwards ever so slightly. “You... don’t have to talk about it. We could just... stay here until we fall asleep. My parents know, anyway, about the whole... powers situation. They’ll understand if they find you here.”
Kusuo nods, then you lie down and make space for him. He shakes his head. “I’ll sleep on the floor.”
“Hey, wait,” you stand up and rub your eyes, “there is a futon somewhere in my closet. Use that.”
“You go ahead and rest, I can use my Psychokinesis to lay it all out.”
“You sure you don’t need my help, Kusuo?”
He shakes your head at you. “You’ve already helped me a lot tonight. Please, rest. It’s fine.”
You climb back into bed and slowly make yourself comfortable. Through a yawn, you still manage to make conversation with Kusuo, “Just... wake me up when you need me, alright?”
“Mhm. Sleep well.”
You close your eyes with a gentle smile. “Yeah, you too. Good night.”
“Good night.”
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lynn-tged-posting · 6 months ago
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tged webtoon ep 165 spoilers and thoughts below the cut that im not terribly late on this time yippee!
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what if i went up to you and stared at you like this
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HAHAHAHAHAAA I LOVE THIS PANEL SO SO MUCH
ive been sending this on like all my socmeds and to all my mutuals/irls. im tormenting them with it it's just so fucking cute and silly . puppy dog eyes javier. pleading emoji. he's just so fucking silly ALKJDFLSDKF HELL I MADE IT MY DISCORD PFP ITS SO GOOFY I LOVE IT SM HAHAHA CUTE CUTE CUTE
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HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
silly panels aside back to the top!
lloyd. stop hurting me oh god he looks so tired and gaunt and,,, lifeless. it HURTS seeing him like this, the life he once had just,,, stripped from him.
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LIKE I WANTED TO SEE HIM WITH HIS HAIR DOWN AND MESSY BUT NOT LIKE THIS BRUH WHAT THE HELL SOB SOB SOB
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the invitation oh my god. its so silly goofy but also so so personal its cute as hell its stupid looking but in the most affectionate way possible. the people of the estate really REALLY care about him and god idek if lloyd realizes that bc literally just after this, he apologizes to everyone for not being able to things for them anymore
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not even able to get back up to get back to the bed GOD I FEEL SICK
but it doesnt matter anymore whether or not lloyd can still protect them, the estate has come to care for him so much , its not his protection they want they just fucking love him and he doesnt realize that i feel so fucking ill. lloyd i need you to open your eyes and look at this beautiful land, this beautiful home you've built with your own two hands. ITS NOT OVER YET PLEASE GOD ITS NOT OVER
and then lloyd without second thought chooses javier to live. because he really thinks hes just an extra getting in the way, a burden, a bug that shouldnt be there. so he thinks its fine if he, as a side character, is the one that dies SOMEONE PUNCH ME.
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he looks so fucking SMALL. alone and in the dark IM GONNA EXPLODE INTO TEN BILLION PIECES. who wrote this fuckass program. SWEAR TO GOD IM COMIN DOWN TO FIX IT MYSELF GOD DAMMIT
AND THEN THE SYSTEM TEXTBOX COMING IN IM SO GRATEFUL PLEASE HELP HIM SOB SOB SOB
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im super duper heartwarmed to see that whoever is running the blue textbox is on suho's side. it has never been impartial, huh,,, it just wants to see his wish come true. ooogh my heart.
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lloyd looks,,, strangely peaceful here. is he like, paused rn? im not really sure what the system box is up to, but hopefully thisll delay anything from happening while javier is concocting his plan,,,
speaking of!
FATE KICKING IN LIKE TEN TIMES WORSE IS SO DAMN SCARY. THE MULTIPLE GIGATITANS OH GODDD im so fucking terrified. javier please hurry!!! he looks rlly cool on draggy here hehe
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I THINK JAVIER AND ALICIAS EXCHANGE TOO IS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS. alicia, upon only seeing javier, immediately is suspicious of lloyd scheming something. she thinks the two of them are plotting again, hence the "what are you up to".
the problem is that it's just javier on this plan. there is no lloyd directing him, so javiers reaction is SO silly fun bc i. dont think he thinks of himself as being. scheming?? bc he seems SO confused at alicia's skepticism here HADLFKJSDLFKJ ITS SO FUNNY
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I REALLY THINK JAVIER WAS GENUINELY A LITTLE CONFUSED AS TO WHY ALICIA WAS QUESTIONING HIM PLEAAASEEE
i think javier believes he's just going about business as usual. doing what he can to protect his lord, as he does, all the time, the usual. sure that involves getting an angel to ask the queen for the eye of summer, but that's certainly not plotting on the same scale that lloyd does. javier isnt a schemer. he just does whats necessary to protect the one he cares about the most. hence his goofy innocent puppy eyes, because its not like hes "up" to anything. idk how accurate this assessment is, so pls correct me if im wrong, but I LOVE IT A LOT HES JUST SO FUCKING DEDICATED I LOVE U JAVIER MVP!!!!!
and then raphie shows up yay!! EXCEPT HELP WHY DID HE GET SUCKED BACK IMMEDIATELY WHAT THE HELL he was so underprepared. poor guy. getting thrown around like this sob sob
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ALICIA ASKING IF THIS IS SMTH JAVIER KNEW ABT OR IF THEY WERE PLANNING SOMETHING AND THEN JAVIER BEING GENUINELY FUCKING SHOCKED HELP MEEEE "maybe its not a prank...?" LMFAOOOOO
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i mentioned this in the last ep post but like. again javier wears his heart on his sleeve he's so fucking protagonist its unreal. hell, not even on his sleeve, he has his heart out on his damn palm sob sob
i think he's shocked here bc he didnt expect raphaels call to play out like that, he prolly thought theyd issue it more seriously. the issue with this being so half-hearted is now alicia isnt absolutely certain that this is the will of the heavens, so she's less inclined to follow along. it doesnt help that her board of nobles (seriously why does she keep these bozos around they just keep yapping) are arguing back and forth abt whether or not to listen. this is kind of a little wrench in the smoothness of the plan... everything now hinges on alicia's whim now.
anyway two more panels javier being menacing/blunt as hell and alicia thinking on her throne,,, god they are so fucking. awesome i love them so much
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anyway that is ALL! for this week! the episode felt a little bit slow to be honest, but i think that's because the events of this ep are little things that build up to whats next, so i dont mind it at all (especially since the last couple of eps have been super fast lately)! i really really enjoy this buildup and im super excited to see what happens next,,,
see yall next week! lloyd please be okay! or ill cry! like for real!
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1d1195 · 2 years ago
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Right Here
Hi, idk if you all know this about me, but I love tropes. ALL of them. All. of. them. So here they all are: one bed, nightmares, enemies to lovers, hurt/comfort, childhood "friendship," coworker Harry, grumpy/sunshine (I'll let you guess who's who), etc. etc. etc. (Don't look too close this is Zipper but reveresed)
Other warnings: angst
9.2k+ words
“Business or pleasure?” The driver asked.
She stated “business,” immediately. Whereas Harry said, “a bit of both,” with that devilish smirk of his and looked at her with delight in his eyes. He seemed to get more enjoyment out of his comment as she glared at him.
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In Year 2, Harry was playing with a few of his friends by the slide. He wasn’t really aware of what was happening but there was a girl in his class playing with a couple of her friends when the screaming started. There was a huge to-do; parents were called, the principal was involved, and the girl that seemed to be at the center of all the drama would not stop glaring at Harry.
But Harry didn’t like girls. He was six. He wanted to hang out with his friends at recess and maybe learn about the shapes and the planets if he had time. So, he didn’t really care that she glared at him. Or that he had to write an apology letter (that his mum told him how to write in his six-year-old scrawl). It was just another day in the life of a Year 2 student. He didn’t even know why he was writing the little note to her. He didn’t know what happened or why he did something wrong.
Year 2 turned to Year 3 and soon Harry was kissing and hugging his mum and sister goodbye as he went off to university. He was studying English Literature and Communications. He wanted to be a book publisher—mainly because he wanted an excuse to read all kinds of books. Moreover, he could read really good books before everyone else did. Eventually, he hoped to open his own publishing company, but he would need a business partner for that.
That was still a long way down the road. For the time being, he would enjoy university: friends, girlfriends, classes, his part time job, and everything in between. His only downfall was listening to his professor who suggested he get a minor in business—especially if he planned on own his own company. Even if he didn’t fully run the business side of things, it was good to have a general idea. Some key words and concepts would be helpful. More so, if the business partner wasn’t someone he trusted.
But Harry was awful with his business classes. The very first one he took was the bane of his existence. He strongly considered never opening his own company, he would just get the other person to handle it. Needless to say, he was recommended for tutoring two weeks into the class.
That’s where he found the glaring girl. Obviously, no longer seven. She was twenty, like Harry. And she was lovely looking. Except for the scowl on her face directed at Harry. Surely, she hadn’t harbored a grudge toward Harry since she was seven?
Oh, but she was. She was curt while she tutored. Everything Harry did was wrong. She managed to correct his mistakes kindly, but he could tell it pained her. There was a lot of sighing and eye-rolling involved. But she was good, he’d give her that.
Harry tried to be friendly, but she clearly wanted no part of it. “I am not here for small talk with you, Harry,” her voice was flat. She didn’t want to talk about the weather, or parties, or anything that wasn’t part of Harry’s class. When she came to help him at the designated time in the library with tears in her eyes, she sat down, took a deep breath, sniffled, and started her help with his homework.
“Hey, we don’t have t’do this now, beautiful. You’re obviously upset—”
“What do you care?” She interrupted.
“Jesus,” Harry shook his head in disbelief. “What is your problem?” She rolled her eyes, tearfully. “Y’can’t seriously still be mad about Year 2.”
She shook her head. “Just...shut it,” she snapped and turned her attention to Harry’s assignment. He sighed, looking at her like she was on the verge of a breakdown but did as she wished. Listening intently to her lesson, Harry felt this pull of how sad he was by her anguish, and he didn’t even know what it was. He kept watching her expressions, judging her tone, in between her explanations. He was worried there was something seriously wrong.
Despite her anger towards him, he didn’t want her to be upset. He worried someone had hurt her or upset her in some way—in a way that he could fix. It didn’t occur to him why he wanted to help her until well after three other classes she tutored him in for his minor over the last two years of university.
He got very little information out of her about anything that didn’t pertain to his classes. He knew she was grumpy in the afternoon and much preferred to tutor in the morning when her mind was fresh. That was when he got a glimpse of her gentler side—for only a second. She liked coffee a lot, she smelled fresh of her shampoo, and her eyes were brighter. She would ask if he had a good weekend or if he had any fun plans. It was the only time she offered up anything to him.
If it was any time past two in the afternoon, she wanted nothing to do with pleasantries or Harry, it seemed. But she was paid to tutor him, and she did it well. Harry never would have made it through his business classes without her. He was forever thankful for her help, even if she didn’t want to be thanked.
*
“Harry, would you like to go to this conference?”
He looked up from his desk where he was reading a riveting historical fiction novel that was passed up the chain to him. Harry thought it would be a NYT bestseller for sure. “Me?” He asked, clearing his throat and putting his pencil down. One thing he hated was marking up people’s hard work in any color pen—but especially red. It felt very secondary school of his coworkers to do it that way. Someone pored over this writing and of course no one expected it to be perfect, not even the author. But there was something so ugly about red ink marking up something that your blood, sweat, and tears went into.
Harry would quit writing if he saw even one smidge of red ink on his work.
Which is why he edited and didn’t publish his own work.
Harry had been a senior editor for four years, now. He loved his job. It was everything he hoped for: he read so many good stories and felt he was still learning so much. He was promoted from junior editor to senior editor after two years. He still hoped to own his own company one day.
“Yeah,” his boss rolled his eyes. “Who else would I send? Someone from the business administration team will attend as well,” he explained.
Harry smiled; he knew the second the title left his mouth exactly who would be attending the conference with him. She was going to hate it. “I would love to go,” Harry nodded excitedly. “But between you and me, I don’t want anyone t’get jealous that m’going. D’you think y’can keep it a secret?”
“Yeah, sure,” he shrugged. Harry loved this office. It was so carefree. When he had his own company, he would want it to be exactly like this. If he could own this one, he would. He liked all of his coworkers and would want to keep them alongside him.
Including the girl from the admin team that constantly glared at him during work parties, meetings, and office breakroom run ins. If she wasn’t there, then it wouldn’t be worth it.
When Harry saw her interact with their coworkers, he couldn’t help but fall more in love with her. She was so utterly beautiful, funny, and of course, absolutely brilliant. There wasn’t a question she didn’t know how to answer. There wasn’t any advice she couldn’t give. She was never condescending and was extremely helpful. Even when Harry needed her help—which was so rare he only recalled it three times in the entire seven years they worked together. She didn’t sigh, didn’t roll her eyes although he was sure she wanted to.
So, nothing made him happier than annoying her to pieces.
He told everyone he had known her since Year 2. Left notes for her on her cute little lunch box in the fridge, would constantly send random items to her office (his favorite was the look on her face when he sent her a bouquet of balloons. It didn’t do anything, but people said Happy Birthday to her all day, and she had to say it wasn’t). He would tell people they were best friends and watch her blush bright red trying to get out of it. There were so many fake secrets he told the person he was near making direct eye contact with her, just to piss her off.
It worked every time.
He worshipped her, honestly. How could he not? She was brilliant and beautiful. The whole package. Even when she was a bit crabby, he thought she was simply the cutest and went on adoring her from afar.
Harry couldn’t imagine how fun a work trip would be with her.
*
She hated flying. It was necessary but she hated it. The space was almost too small. It was stuffy and gross in a lot of ways. The seats were cramped, and it was just awful. She had her headphones in place, a relaxing, quiet playlist, a good book, and her travel pillow around her neck. She was more than ready to begin the flight. The conference was a treat, it was shorter hours than her regular workday and then she could meander the town as much as she pleased. It was going to be a great trip and she had been looking forward to it for the last two weeks.
But then Harry sat right beside her. “Hey beautiful,” he smiled sweetly. She stared at him. This had to be a joke.
“You’re kidding?”
“What?” He smirked impishly stowing his bag beneath the seat in front of him. “Excited t’see me?” She flushed that beautiful shade of red that he loved so much on her cheeks. “Ready for our vacation?” He asked. “Bring a good book?”
The plane was suddenly even smaller. She thought she was going to be sick. A whole five days with Harry. Five. She was going to lose her mind. She closed her eyes as the plane jolted forward. Harry was doing all the things he wasn’t supposed to be doing. Fidgeting with the tray table and the like. She wanted to scream.
How could she possibly get stuck with him?
*
Harry didn’t say much to her throughout the flight. At least not after asking if she was comfortable, which was objectively nice if she couldn’t stand him so much. He grabbed her bag from the bin overhead, made sure she didn’t get lost on her way to baggage claim, and held the door open for her when they reached their Uber. “Business or pleasure?” The driver asked.
She stated “business,” immediately. Whereas Harry said, “a bit of both,” with that devilish smirk of his and looked at her with delight in his eyes. He seemed to get more enjoyment out of his comment as she glared at him.
She really wished Harry wasn’t so goddamn hot. It should have been a sin to make someone so alarmingly attractive. Soft brown curls that looked like they were made to slip between her fingers. He had green eyes—how was that even fair? Those dimples made her stomach flip. He was incredibly tall and so fit; she thought about falling at his feet every day she saw him at work and just ending her silly grudge.
But she never forgave him for that day in Year 2. Call her stubborn, call her stupid. She didn’t care. It ruined a huge chunk of her young life and made her miserable.
Four days and twenty-two hours. She could survive.
“Me and the missus need a place t’eat, do y’have any suggestions?” he asked, reaching for her hand like they really were a couple. She yanked it out of his grip. She wanted to kill him. More so because she hated the way her heart took off when he touched her and the idea of being “the missus” was...ugh.
She was worried Harry wouldn’t survive the next four days, twenty-one hours, and fifty-eight minutes.
*
They arrived at the hotel and Harry was once more a gentleman, even though she didn’t want him to be. He grabbed her suitcase and sweetly pushed it through the lobby to the front desk. “Hi,” Harry said cheerfully. She wanted to shower, get out of her plane clothes, and get away from Harry. His chipper attitude was making her grumpier than normal. “I have a reservation under Styles,” he explained. “Here for the convention,” he added.
The man behind the desk nodded, smiling pleasantly as he tapped away on his computer. “It says two guests for your name,” he informed him. Her heart dropped to her feet.
“No, it doesn’t,” she murmured, but she knew it was right.
Harry was smiling like an idiot. This was too good to be true for him and his endless bouts of annoying her. “That’s correct,” Harry nodded.
“Are there any other rooms?” She asked. She already knew the answer, but she would kick herself if she didn’t at least check.
“No, I’m afraid we’re really booked with the convention.”
She didn’t dare ask if there were two beds because she already knew that answer too.
“It’ll be fine, lovie, don’t worry,” he promised. Part of her thought he really meant it too, sensing how upset she was. She was so overcome with frustration; she almost didn’t notice the new name he gave her. That it wouldn’t be torture for her to be in the same little space as Harry for the entire five days. Her heart started erratically beating at the thought. It felt like the sides of her brain were caving in like the walls surely would be when they got to the room.
She would lay ground rules. She would go buy a roll of tape and cut the room in half. Harry wasn’t going to ruin her little reprieve from work. He continued to be kind and pulled her bag to their room. “I would like to shower,” she told him as she eyed the single, king-sized bed in the middle of the room, mocking her. He settled the bags on opposite sides of the room. He chose the side closer to the window for her.
“I’ll be right in,” he winked at her.
She felt the heat rise to her cheeks, which she knew was exactly what he wanted. “What if I don’t want the window side?” She asked instead.
“Well, that I don’t really care, lovie. M’taking closer t’the door in case someone breaks in. Wouldn’t want you t’get hurt.”
She just wanted to annoy him the way he always annoyed her. Maybe make him move the bags around and then move them again which she informed him she did want the window side. But she didn’t expect him to be so nice. Didn’t think he would give a reason that was kind enough to care about her well-being. Even when she was grumpy toward him.
If her cheeks were going to be red the whole week, she was going to lose it. “Don’t come in the bathroom or I’ll murder you,” she rolled her eyes.
“I would never do that,” he rolled his eyes right back at her. “I was jus’ kidding.”
Unfortunately, she believed him. He seemed genuine, as much as she wanted to kill him.
*
The shower helped her relax marginally. At the very least she got the feeling of the plane off her. “I ordered some pizza. Y’like peppers and onions on yours, right?” Harry, knowing exactly what she liked, furthered her agitation.
“Yeah,” she mumbled.
“I’d like t’shower too. D’you think y’can get the pizza when it arrives and actually get mine too?” He smiled at her knowingly; like he thought she might not take his pizza from the delivery guy in protest of the whole situation.
She rolled her eyes but had to hand it to him because it did sound like her. “Yes, Harry.”
“Hey beautiful?” he said softly. She hated that she looked up, answering to his pretty pink lips calling her ‘beautiful.’ She shouldn’t have. First and foremost, she thought he was wrong. Maybe it was because of all the drama of Year 2 but she never had boys of any age fawning over her after the slide-incident. Not the way they ogled and adored her friends. It did a number on her self-esteem. While she tried to put up this front that she didn’t care about whether she was beautiful or not, it was hard to believe someone like Harry would recognize her as even pretty.
Secondly, it made her stomach flip when he said it and she hated that. It was unfair he was pretty and unfair he could make her crazy with just a word. “M’not so bad,” his face looked apologetic—like he felt bad for existing. “I promise, it won’t be that bad this week with me.” She nodded sullenly, ran her brush through her hair. “’Ve left some notes on the table there for the pizza,” he tilted his chin toward it.
“You don’t need to pay for me.”
He smiled. “Course I do, lovie. S’my treat.”
She hated the way she answered to ‘lovie’too.
*
She sat in comfortable silence while she ate her pizza. While eating, she looked at the itinerary on her phone. Made plans in her mind and thought about some of the things she wanted to do during her free time.
“Oh good, m’starving. Smelled it while I was showering.”
She did a double take, her jaw falling open instinctively. She nearly dropped her pizza on her lap and then her phone right after it. Harry was hurrying across the room to get to his pizza. A towel low on his hips showing off glistening, taut muscles. Her heart hammered against her chest. “Jesus,” she whispered to herself looking away.
“Did y’say something, beautiful?” He asked, taking a bite of his pizza. She shook her head. Once more, angry she answered with the word ‘beautiful’.  His hair was dripping, and she followed the little droplets as they slid down his broad shoulders and across his defined pectorals. It wasn’t fair. She wanted to hate him easily. But his pretty tattoos and his gorgeous body were making it so difficult.
“I’m think I’m going to sleep on the floor,” she told him. He frowned around a bite of his pizza. When he finished chewing, he had a bit of grease on each corner of his mouth. She wanted to reach out with a napkin and wipe it away.
Or lick it away, along with the rest of his body.
“I’ll be the perfect gentleman,” he promised. “M’not gonna let y’sleep on the floor, lovie,” he rolled his eyes. “If you’re that uncomfortable, I’ll sleep on the floor.”
She couldn’t help but feel bad that her awkwardness, her annoyance for Harry, would have him sleep on the floor. He didn’t truly deserve that. This was a work trip for him as well, after all.
Maybe if he was fully clothed, she would have taken him up on his offer. Accepted him sleeping on the floor in her place. But her modern-woman, intelligent brain that she had spent years cultivating so she was independent, and worked so hard to make sure she didn’t go ga-ga over a man was malfunctioning from travel...and knowing she was stuck with Harry in such close quarters for almost a week.
Plus, Harry had the prettiest stomach she had ever seen on a man.
Her primal brain, the one that seemed to be screaming from between her legs, couldn’t help but feel bad for him.
“It’s…fine,” she mumbled focusing on her pizza and phone again.
“Are y’sure, beautiful? I don’t want t’make y’uncomfortable.”
She believed him. He seemed so eager to please her and ease her worries. She nodded. “It’ll be fine,” she was telling herself in hopes it would be true. “But I’m making a pillow wall.”
He smiled around his pizza.
*
“Would y’prefer I sleep with or without a shirt?” He asked. Harry went to use the hotel gym and then took another shower. She used the time to read her book and sit on the balcony while the sun was setting. It wasn’t a picturesque view or anything, but the sky was a bunch of beautiful hues of pink, blue, and orange.
When Harry exited the shower, it was awkwardly silent for a bit. Harry tended to his after shower-care. She was looking at her book but not reading. She yawned, and that was when Harry asked his question. The inquiry felt like a double-edged sword. If she said with a shirt, it might imply she wanted to hide him from her view because she couldn’t help but look at him. If she said no, it would make it seem like she wanted to see him. “Whatever makes you comfortable,” she decided on.
He smirked and pulled his T-shirt off. “‘Fraid you’re not privy t’that sleeping habit, lovie.” She wondered if anyone had ever been murdered with a hotel phone cord. She felt extremely self-conscious about her t-shirt and leggings combo. “Feel free t’do the same, beautiful,” he grinned wickedly at her as he slipped into his side of the bed. She had two pillows under the blankets and two on top. She was certain that even if she had her own room, it wouldn’t be enough distance between them. “What if I want another pillow?” He asked mischievously.
“Go fuck yourself, Harry,” she grumbled.
He frowned. “C’mon, lovie. S’not so bad.” She didn’t say anything in response and turned to her side facing away from him. She scrolled mindlessly on her phone. “D’you want t’watch something together?” He asked.
“No, thank you,” she murmured quietly. “You can though,” she shrugged. “I’ll sleep through most anything.”
He nodded. “Okay...well...good night, beautiful. Sleep well,” he said sweetly.
She didn’t fall asleep right away. Instead, she imagined the nice museum she saw online. The picturesque street about a mile away with cute little shops. There was the coffee shop she wanted to go to. All the things that Harry couldn’t ruin with his annoying little remarks.
Or his stupid hot body.
Other than some gentle laughter, she didn’t hear or worry about Harry sleeping less than six inches from her own body. The pillows provided the perfect barrier between them so that she could sleep easily knowing that he wouldn’t bug her.
Only four days until it was over. She could do this.
*
Harry heard her phone drop from her hands to the floor about an hour later. He hurried to her side of the room and made sure her alarm was set, locked her phone, and placed it on her nightstand. He saw the way she seemed to shiver in her sleep. Probably because she was right under the vent. The space between her brows puckered due to her discomfort. He draped the blanket that was at the end of the bed over her. Almost immediately, the skin between her eyebrows smoothed back out. He wanted to kiss her in the very same spot but of course would never do that without her permission.
The movie Harry was playing was funny and he enjoyed it immensely. True to her word, she slept through his laughter and the sound of the movie itself. She was wiggly when she slept. The pillows and blankets balled all around her and Harry wondered how she slept like that each night. It looked nearly painful at times.
Of course, the movie came to an end, and she was still sound asleep when Harry finally turned the TV off and hunkered down into his side of the mattress. He tried not to disturb her pillow wall, but she had managed to throw all of them every which way. He smirked to himself, shaking his head at her.
Harry must have gotten only an hour of sleep under his belt when he woke up to her kicking and mumbling under her breath. The light coming through the window allowed for his eyes to adjust a bit to the darkness against her figure sprawled in the sheets. He shook his head glancing over at her in complete disarray.  Her body was still twisted around the pillows and blankets. Harry was left with just the sheet. He smirked at her.
He threw his arm over his eyes and ignored her fitful movements. But they kept going and going. The mumbling too. He felt bad about whatever she was dreaming about, but he didn’t dare touch her. If she woke up to him touching her, even if it was for comfort, he was certain she would kill him.
Harry was a pretty heavy sleeper himself, so her fussy movements didn’t bother him in the slightest. Whatever she was dreaming about had to be a kick for sure and for that he felt bad.
But then Harry heard small whimpers coming from her and he felt his stomach knot. It felt like he was dying at the mere sound of her discomfort. The anguish he felt coming from her was brutal and he wanted nothing more than to hold her and fix it. “Oh, hey,” he hummed, sitting up against the headboard. He looked her over and thought incurring her wrath would be well worth it if he could stop her from whimpering miserably. “Lovie? Y’okay?” He gently shook her by the shoulder. She seemed to be fighting whatever she was dreaming about, and the blankets were keeping her trapped. Harry grabbed the pillows that were on top of her. Her arms were nearly swaddled against her body with the blanket wrapped around her and pulled up to her neck tightly.
Harry flicked the light on his nightstand so he could get a better look at her.
The poor thing was glistening with sweat around her hairline, tears were leaking from her closed eyes, and that space between her brows was cinched together like she was in pain. “Oh, no,” he murmured and crawled out of his side and came around to her side. “Hey,” he cooed. He crouched in front of her and began tossing the pillows to the floor. He unraveled the blankets from around her. “Lovie,” he murmured. He called her lovie at the start of the evening and he couldn’t stop. He loved to call her beautiful and enjoyed how readily she answer to it. But something about her sweet face just made the word ‘lovie’ roll right off his tongue. It was effortless; like it was the only thing he should call her. Once she was without the swaddle of blankets, and the pillows attacking her, she was practically gasping for air in her sleep. “Lovie, you’re having a bad dream,” he gave her a good shake causing her eyes to flash open. Harry gazed at her in alarm. She squeezed her eyes shut trying to hide from Harry. But it was far too late for that. “Are y’okay, beautiful?”
She ignored him. Her breathing evening out. She turned away from him. “Lovie...”
“Would you stop calling me cute names?” She asked, the exasperation thick in her voice. But she was still distraught. He could tell. He was quiet for a minute letting her work through whatever just happened. “Please don’t tell anyone about this,” she whispered.
He blinked. He felt so sad she believed so little of him. “I would never tell anyone anything ‘bout you—”
“You whisper about me all the time,” she snipped.
His mouth fell open in disbelief. “Lovie, you have t’know I don’t whisper anything ‘bout you. M’telling them how pretty I think y’are and how you’ll get all flustered that m’whispering nothing ‘bout you. They know I adore you and think nothing short of wonderful things ‘bout you. Y’seriously don’t get it do you?” He felt so utterly annoyed by her, himself. He thought she was lovely and yes; she was fun to annoy but he would never say anything about her that hurt her reputation. He was sad she thought he would. It never made sense for her to dislike him so intently. He never really cared and turned it into a joke. But knowing she truly didn’t like him made his heart heavy.
She refused to look at him. It was silent for several beats. Harry stared at the back of her t-shirt, her shoulders trying to find an easy rhythm. He wanted her to explain it. Right now. In the middle of the night when they were stuck in a small hotel room together. “Why did you trap me in the slide?” She whispered.
Of all the things he expected her to say, that was not one of them. “What?” He shook his head.
“In Year 2? You and your friends trapped me in the slide, now I’m embarrassingly claustrophobic. If I have anything covering my face, I have a meltdown. It feels like I can’t breathe. If someone...holds me the wrong way for too long, I get overwhelmed. It’s ruined so many relationships and it’s...” she sniffled, her shoulders staggering a bit at the effort.
He frowned. “Is that why you hate me?” He whispered. She didn’t answer him. “Lovie, I had nothing to do with that.”
“Well, they blamed you.”
He sighed. “So, all this time you’ve hated me, and it wasn’t even my doing?” He asked.
It seemed to appeal to the logical part of her brain. She was still for a moment longer, her breathing evening out. But then she rolled to her other side and stared at Harry. He hated the tears that stained her cheeks. That little crease between her eyebrows. He reached out and pressed his fingers there to smooth it out and she let him. It didn’t even bother him that she hadn’t liked him for so long.
Her lips rolled into her mouth as she thought over the last twenty-something years of their lives. It may not have bothered Harry but now it bothered her. “Why have you liked me even though I’m so...crabby toward you?”
He smiled excitedly. Like he was getting a Christmas present or told he won a raffle. “What isn’t there t’like ‘bout you, beautiful?” His hand cupped her cheek and his thumb gently rubbed at the stain of salt on her cheek. The back of her head was warm with sweat and if it wasn’t so late at night, she would feel more self-conscious.
“You’re a glutton for punishment.”
It was progress though because she didn’t push his hand away from her face. “Can I get back on the bed? I won’t touch you, but I don’t want you t’have the pillows and blankets attack you.”
“You can touch me,” she mumbled.
He wiggled his eyebrows at her. “Oh yeah?” He rose from the floor to head back to his side of the bed.
She rolled her eyes at him. “I hate you.”
“I don’t think y’do, actually,” he said smugly.
“Are you going to annoy me the entire time?”
Harry turned off his bedside lamp and crawled under the sheet. “Probably.”
She sighed; he imagined her pretty eye roll the way she always did. Harry put his arm behind his head, closed his eyes and tried to drift off to sleep. “You really didn’t trap me in there?” She asked.
Harry turned to his side and looked at the shadow outline of her staring up at the ceiling. He wanted to reach out and trace the shape of her profile, follow it down her arm and hold her hand. “Even as a six-year-old, lovie, I couldn’t hurt you. If...I knew...I would have gotten y’out of there so fast,” he promised. “Poor baby,” he murmured and bravely reached out and grabbed her hand. She didn’t pull from him. She let his fingers fit between the spaces of hers, gave her a gentle squeeze.
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I didn’t know why you were mad,” he shrugged.
“You were really just going to let me hate you for the rest of our life?”
“Hate and love are very close together in the brain,” he said knowingly. “Given y’said the rest of our life,” he smiled excitedly, “I had a feeling y’couldn’t keep it up forever. And I’d wait forever for you, beautiful.” He sounded so arrogant she wanted to hate him just to spite him. But she couldn’t argue with him. It was exhausting hating him. Being in the hotel room with him—especially when he was in a towel—was ruining her grumpy front. Even with sleep still on her brain, she couldn’t help but think about how gentle he was with her and her anxious mind. He was so utterly accommodating and kind to her. He would have slept on the floor if she asked. But she rather enjoyed the feel of his fingers holding hers. “Do you have nightmares a lot?” He asked, interrupting her thoughts.
She shook her head. “Not anymore...Only when I get all twisted like that. I usually sleep better with a weighted blanket to help my anxiety about it. It also keeps me in place, mostly. I’ve had a lot of therapy to help cope with it and the blanket usually helps but obviously y’can’t really travel with a fifteen-pound blanket.”
“Can you snuggle?” He asked.
She blinked at the darkness in front of her. “Can I what?”
“Can you snuggle with someone?” He repeated.
She bit the inside of her lip. “As long as my face isn’t covered,” she muttered. “But it’s definitely been a problem in past relationships if that’s what you’re asking me ab—”
Harry had his arms looping around her and he pulled her toward him so quickly, she barely had time to process. His body spooned behind her, one arm snug beneath her neck and the other draped around the front of her hips. Her heart rate had to be approaching a hundred and fifty. “Is this alright, beautiful?” He murmured into the back of her hair. She was speechless, truly. Harry holding her like...like she didn’t just have a major meltdown. Like he adored her still. “Lovie?” He said, nearly releasing her when she didn’t answer. Worried that her heart rate was too high—he could practically feel it through her back pressed to him. Maybe this was too much.
But right as he started to pull away, her arm pressed against Harry’s. She sighed softly. “No...m’fine,” her voice was quiet.
“Are y’sure? I don’t want t’upset you,” he promised. “Been dreaming ‘bout snuggling with you... but not at the expense of your comfort or anxiety,” he assured her.
“You dream about cuddling with me?”
“Among other things,” he spoke to the back of her hair, his lips smiling against her head.
She rolled her eyes. “You’re an idiot.”
“I really didn’t think y’could hate me forever, lovie.”
She was quiet for a few moments. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. It was the first time she ever apologized to him. His heart skipped a beat.
“I know, beautiful. How would y’have known, though? I wish y’told me, but I know why y’didn’t.”
More silence. Harry’s bare stomach was touching her t-shirt, his legs were crooked up against the back of hers. They fit like puzzle pieces. She bit the inside of her lip feeling exhaustion pull over her mind. How was she supposed to sleep knowing Harry was sleeping right next to her?
“Good night, lovie,” he murmured.
She sighed, relaxing, and drifting to sleep almost immediately.
*
The first day of the conference went by quickly with not much to really show for it. Harry enjoyed it immensely and had a thousand new ideas that he suggested to her over their lunch together. She enjoyed it as well but after her night snuggled up to Harry nothing else seemed remotely important.
“Hey, lovie?” Harry said, trying to retrieve her attention. “Did y’have plans this afternoon? M’gonna catch up with a friend,” he nodded toward another table. The idea of Harry leaving her alone actually saddened her, but of course...they’d have the night.
Unless the friend was a girl. In which case he very well could not come back to their shared room. She nodded. “Yeah, I’m good. Have fun,” she encouraged.
He smiled and pressed a kiss to her cheek. “Keep the bed warm for me, yeah?” He winked at her as he pulled away.
She thought maybe killing him would still be an option.
She perused the little picturesque street taking a whole bunch of pictures and stopping in nearly every shop on the street and making a purchase in almost every single one. It was actually really nice. Not too hot, not too cold. She even sort of wished Harry had gone with her on her little adventure. She thought he would have liked some of the shops as much as she did.
It was precisely when she wished Harry had gone with her that she realized she really liked him. All this time.
Maybe he was right, and her brain mistook her affection for him as hatred. She wasn’t ready to say love yet. Even if her subconscious was screaming about how lovely he was.
Even last night when Harry was comforting and gentle about her phobia. He didn’t make her feel bad...in fact he made her feel normal and wonderful. The new information about the slide was a revelation. She had spent so many years with ill-harbored feelings toward Harry. It seemed wasteful after last night. He was kind, understanding, attractive—
She was not in love with him.
She couldn’t be, right?
He was annoying. Even if he wasn’t whispering about her, he was still making her feel grumpy. The constant gag gifts and deliveries were vexing beyond compare.
But those dimples when he smiled? They could undo all those negative emotions she felt. She was certain that there was some pheromone or chemical released in the air when he smiled. One that made her mind momentarily forget that he had been the cause of the slide thing.
However, that wasn’t true anymore.
So...
No. It’s like meeting someone for the first time. You don’t love him.
Not when he called her beautiful or lovie. Not when he openly flirted with her or held her against his warm body in the middle of the night and kept the nightmares away. She did not love him.
But maybe she just really, really, really, really, liked him and wanted to spend all her extra time with him now and show him the little shop she found because she smelled three different kinds of soap that she thought he would enjoy.
Obviously, that wasn’t love.
She looked more like some shopping bag monster than girl, when she made her way into the hotel elevator. Harry was already in the room when she got back. “Have fun?” He asked, putting the new file he brought with him and his pencil aside. His smile was so bright she really wondered how she could have ignored him for so long.
“Did…you catch up with your friend?” She asked. She was gone for almost three hours, she worried that she would come back to find Harry with someone, or someone in the shower...
Or in our bed. One part of her mind was grumpy at the thought. Not our bed. The one brain cell left on the rational side of her mind shouted back.
Harry began untangling her wrists and fingers from the bags she held while her brain had its own conversation. The bags left angry red marks on her skin. He nodded, placing the bags on the floor. “Yeah, jus’ had a quick stop at the pub for a drink,” he gently massaged the inside of her wrists. “I missed you,” he said cutely. She stared at him almost suspiciously. Like maybe all of this was a trick. Her distrust seemed palpable because he frowned. “I did, beautiful. Really missed you,” he brought her wrist to his lips and pressed a kiss on the soft inside skin. She missed him too. Even before she went to the shops, she was dreading leaving his side, but she wouldn’t tell him that. Her face must have softened a bit because the left side of his face turned up in a gorgeous half smile. It made her wonder how Harry had decided on editing and publishing and not modeling. “Would y’like t’get dinner with me?” He asked.
“Like a date?” She blurted out before she could stop herself.
“Yes, lovie. Like a date,” he rolled his eyes.
She frowned. “I don’t really have anything...date-worthy to wear.”
“Well, y’could go naked, but they might throw y’out.”
“Shut. Up.”
“Y’look beautiful now. I’d take y’out in the sexy pajamas y’wore last night.”
She wondered briefly if Harry had ever been hit in the head over the years and suffered irrevocable brain damage. “Sexy?”
“Your leggings?” He smiled mischievously. “M’almost jealous of ‘em touching all of your legs.”
Definitely hit in the head.
“Can I just...have a few minutes to touch up?” She asked, ignoring his comment.
“Course, beautiful. Not that y’need it.” He was good. She would give him that. He was very good at making her feel gooey and pretty. Harry said all the right flirty things. Dinner would be fun, and she was quite hungry.
She exited the bathroom after touching up her makeup and switching out her casual business blouse for a tank top with a cardigan. She swapped her slacks for a pair of jeans. The flats she wore stayed to complete her outfit.
“Will you marry me?” He sighed dreamily as she exited the bathroom.
He was going to give her an aneurysm.
“Shut up, Harry.”
“Ve’been waiting for this date for...” he smiled. “Oh, I don’t know, lovie. Least since university.”
Harry had to have a death wish. “You’ve...liked me? Even though I was mean to you?”
“A glutton for punishment, as it were,” he winked bringing her words back.
She grabbed her little cross body bag and Harry followed her out their hotel room door. Since the slide incident, she had been to at least four different therapists to help alleviate the worry and fear she had. In all honesty, she was much better than she used to be. The airplane was a little daunting during takeoff but that could have been due to a fear of flying, not claustrophobia. Her small attic or the cramped closet in the hall of her place didn’t bother her any longer. Being on a train in public transport rush hour—even when the train came to a standstill in the middle of the dark tunnel—didn’t really bother her anymore. It was only when her face was covered for too long without her ability to get out quickly, sleeping, plagued with nightmares, or swaddled in her blankets too tightly that she felt the waves of anxiety suffocating her like that day on the slide.
Or when the elevator clanged to a stop and jolted her so hard, she nearly fell into Harry.
It was three seconds of pure silence before she realized what happened. Before Harry realized.
“Shit.” Harry whispered.
“Oh no,” her pulse quickened. Her head started to ache, and it felt like the elevator was suddenly the size of an Amazon box and she was crammed inside. It took her a moment to realize the wheezing was coming from her.
“Hey, hey,” Harry quickly grabbed her shoulders. Her eyes welled with tears, and she was heaving on her breath. One of his hands reached for the emergency button causing a monotone ring to take over all sounds in the small space; the volume was louder than her heavy breathing. “Lovie, tell me what t’do,” he begged. “M’sorry,” he whispered. She felt lightheaded and scared. So scared she obviously was having trouble breathing. She worried that she would pass out right into Harry’s arms.
“M’scared,” she croaked.
“I know, beautiful,” he squeezed her shoulders. He held her away at arm’s length afraid to bring her closer in case it would make matters worse. All he wanted to do was wrap her close and console her. “But...s’okay,” he promised. “Really, s’okay.” It wasn’t; he wasn’t trying to make light of her fear either. He knew how bad it was because he had spent the last twenty years waiting for this moment. For her to say she didn’t hate him. For the last ten, he longed for a date. One measly dinner to change her mind. But the broken elevator was going to ruin it all. Honestly, that didn’t even matter to him. All of it didn’t matter. He had to try something to ease her worry. Something to help her scared mind. “I would never let anything happen t’you. Would never let anything hurt you,” he was gazing right into her eyes. He definitely didn’t cure her, but she could feel how devastated Harry felt. He meant it; he wouldn’t let anything harm her as much as he could possibly control. “Deep breaths? Does that help?” He asked. She nodded. She tried but it was hard, the air she sucked in and released was shaky and not very deep. It was hard to think about breathing deeply when all she could think about was dying in this tin box. “Easy, lovie. S’okay,” he squeezed her shoulders again.
The alarm was plain on his face, and she wondered if he wanted to hold her. She wanted to be held but wasn’t sure it would work. Her stomach felt so knotted. Thought maybe she would throw up and she couldn’t imagine a worse first date with Harry than throwing up in an enclosed space. She sank to the floor, her legs scrunched up so she could rest her forehead against her knees. Harry crouched in front of her, clearly still nervous and unsure of what to do. The one part of her brain that still had some rational thought left thought it was a travesty that she would lose Harry from this. She thought if she made it out, she would have to just go home. She couldn’t share a bed with him.
“They’re probably getting someone t’help right now, beautiful. S’okay,” he placed his hands on her ankles. It seemed like the safest option. He was so mortified this happened. To her of all people. The ringing of the elevator seemed to die down with the ringing in her ears. “Lovie?” He asked; he felt anxious that she was breathing so hard. She looked at him, her vision blurred by the tears. “Tell me what t’do,” he begged. He felt so useless. So worried that she was going to pass out or have a meltdown that she would inextricably link to him and never forgive him. After he just made some progress.
He thought about her six-year-old self. Trapped in that slide, her little brain all terrified. He wondered if that little version of herself still existed inside her. It hurt him to think about that poor little girl scared to pieces. He leaned forward and pressed his lips on her forehead and kept pressed there for a moment. That moment in time seemed to stretch on for eternity. But, as he kept his lips on her skin, he noticed her breathing slowly calmed. Her muscles seemed to relax.
“That feels nice,” she murmured almost serenely. He smirked against her skin. Slowly, he pulled away. Her eyes watched Harry with worry, but he slid beside her before he moved too far away. The shaky breathing picked up just a little. Her heart still fluttered with anxiety. She rested her cheek on her knee facing him.
“I...I could...do it again if y’want. If y’think it would help,” he suggested, turning toward her a little more head on. She lifted her head, it felt so achy and heavy. Harry cupped her face and pressed his lips on her skin again. She sighed softly. The ache seemed to ease at his touch.
Ugh. Harry was medicine that she didn’t know she needed. He dragged his lips across her skin, peppering her hairline with soft little presses. She wondered if he would always be this gentle with her.
She still wasn’t sure how she felt about her mind thinking about things like always with Harry. She was fairly certain she would die of humiliation the moment her brain returned to normal once they got off the elevator. There wouldn’t be an always after this. Harry would think she was nuts or ridiculous. There wouldn’t even be a sometimes.
 “Are y’okay, lovie?” He hummed against her skin. “As y’can be right now?”
She nodded, feeling utterly safe with Harry beside her. She enjoyed the way his hands felt on her skin. His lips on her face. It was too bad she didn’t know all these years he had nothing to do with her childhood trauma. She thought she really could be in love with him.
*
It took an hour, but they were finally freed of the metal tin. The moment she had fresh air, she felt infinitely better. Harry could see it on her face and in her body language. She was entirely at ease. Back to normal. After a flurry of questions and the hotel offering a few extra nights, they left for a nearby restaurant. Harry held her hand, fingers twisted together. He didn’t say much, because he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say after that. He knew she had to have felt so exposed and vulnerable.
“We...don’t have to go out, if you don’t want,” she mumbled.
Harry frowned and stopped the pair of them in the middle of the sidewalk. “Do y’want t’go back?” He asked.
She bit the inside of her lip. “I’m sorry.”
He blinked in surprise. “For what, beautiful?”
“For being crazy?” Did he forget what just happened?
“Crazy?” He repeated in surprise. “Lovie, s’not your fault. M’glad you’re okay.”
“You’re not...you don’t think I’m...weird?”
His heart felt such sadness for her. “No, lovie. Course not. Think you’re lovely. I was so scared y’were going to hurt yourself in all the worry. M’so glad you’re okay. M’sorry y’had to—why are y’crying, beautiful? Are you alright?” He asked, her eyes spilling with tears. He thought he might cry right with her. Harry had a good six or seven inches on her and he bent his knees a bit so he could be eyelevel with her teary gaze. His hands cupped her face just like on the elevator and he looked pained that she was crying.
She shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she whimpered. “I’m so sorry.”
He didn’t know why she was apologizing. But he let her and pulled her toward him, careful not to cover her face with his embrace. She sobbed into his chest. Harry kissed the top of her head. “S’okay, beautiful. Don’t know why you’re apologizing. But s’okay.”
It felt so embarrassingly awful that she and Harry would never be.
*
They ordered takeout, had a drink while they waited—barely speaking as they did, and headed back to the hotel. Of course, they took the stairs. She didn’t even feel like eating as she sat across from Harry on the balcony. He ate his veggie stir fry quietly while she poked at the pasta in her takeout box. “That’s pasta, you remember?” He smirked at her. “You’re supposed t’eat it,” he encouraged. Trying to joke so she would feel a little better.
She couldn’t even muster an eye roll for him. Ending before they started...after a whirlwind of one night and day of the convention seemed utterly unfair.
“Lovie?” He asked quietly. She didn’t respond. She was worried she would cry. “Beautiful,” he murmured setting his food aside, crouched beside her seat and pushed her food to the side as well.
“I...I think I really like you,” she whispered.
He smiled. “Well finally, lovie. But y’don’t have t’cry ‘bout it, m’right here,” he gave her knee a gentle squeeze. Like he was consoling her.
She shook her head. “S’not fair to you or all that time I wasted. And I’m so weird.”
“You’re not weird, lovie,” he promised.
“Yes, I am, Harry.”
He shook his head. “Y’seriously going t’continue pushing me away when m’literally on my knees in front of you, beautiful? I don’t care if y’weird or not. I don’t care if y’cry on elevators or if y’sing in the shower. You’re m’favorite person t’annoy and I want t’do it, knowing I can kiss you after every joke,” he looked up at her eyes from his crouched position. “Y’don’t have t’waste any more time, lovie. M’right here.”
She bit the inside of her cheek, worried she was going to say no or something just because she was so nervous about all of it. It was twenty years of disliking Harry (well, not really, but yes really). That was twenty years of hating small spaces of getting nervous in crowds and explaining to boyfriends that she couldn’t attend some events even when she wanted to.
But Harry didn’t care.
And she believed him.
She should have begged him to leave her alone because it wasn’t fair to him, and she truly believed that. Harry was so much kinder than she ever, ever imagined. Now he was right, of course. He was right here. Right in front of her. Literally on his knees telling her he wanted her. Despite everything. So instead of opening her mouth where she might say no, she nodded slowly.
He sighed with relief and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her toward him. He carefully squeezed her rubbing his hand up and down her back so soothingly she wanted to cry some more. Harry had the gentlest touch, and it was melting her—inside and out. She sighed into his chest, arms wrapping back around him. She even pressed her face right into his T-shirt and didn’t feel the creeping sensation of doom surrounding her. Instead, all she could smell was the scent of Harry’s laundry detergent and the very essence of Harry.
“Thank you, beautiful,” he sighed into the top of her hair, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. He pushed her away from his body but kept her in between his arms. He really loved touching her face. “Can’t wait t’join you in the shower, now,” he winked.
She rolled her eyes. He wasn’t going to quit, that much was certain. “You should be better than that detachable shower head,” she murmured.
He stared at her fully for at least half a minute, unable to speak. He cleared his throat after what seemed like a lifetime and then kissed the center of her forehead followed by the tip of her nose. Right before he kissed her lips for the first time in their lives, he whispered, “that I have t’see, lovie.”
--
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thelivingautomaton · 3 months ago
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MANNNNNNNNN ok. not to get my SEVERANCE brainworms all over the place but i literally cannot stop thinking about this show. also i keep reading theories on reddit and some of them are really good and some are unbelievably stupid/media-illiterate. so i am dumping my wild predictions/theorizing/thoughts on season 2 here. Please Enjoy Every Bullet Point Equally(TM)
OKAY let's get the big one out of the way: it seems pretty apparent now that cold harbor (and maybe all of the datasets mdr is given to "refine") is binning memories/experiences/brainwaves into severance chips, likely in order to reformat or rebuild someone's personality from the ground up.
this reddit post sums a lot of the evidence up but tl;dr you see an electron microscopy image of neural axons, as well as an etCO2 statistic, which is typically used to monitor respiration of someone who's in a coma or on ventilation
MOREOVER, the four aspects of mdr's data line up with kier eagan's four tempers (woe, frolic, dread, malice -- i've also seen it pointed out that this aligns with the four mdr workers, and in the original pilot script there's a reference to "needing" four workers, but iirc they all work on separate files??), and apparently one of his Whole Things(TM) was the idea that you can neatly sort a person's entire personality into those four boxes
the numbers provoke an emotional response in the refiner based on their interpretation of the data, which we can surmise is likely neural/electrical signals of some kind, specifically from brains that have been frozen or cryogenically preserved and are slowly being thawed. hence all the stress over "finishing" files on time, before they "expire" (i.e. brain thaws too much)
the opening credits for season 2 places a HUGE emphasis on big swollen misshapen heads, on brains, and also on ice...including a blink-and-you-miss-it glimpse of a crashed car sinking into the ice, which takes us into our next big point:
gemma obviously didn't die in the car crash BUT!!! lumon taking her and (presumably) replacing her body with a double (mark says he identified her but that she was also "burned" so that's obviously questionable) was actually something of a random fluke. for whatever reason the circumstances of her death made it so that she was ideal to use as a guinea pig for "part-time employment"
again, kind of going off the s2 opening credits here and the image of the car sinking into the ice -- obvs mark visited the tree where she crashed, but i feel like i remember he had to drive on a bridge overlooking a body of water to get there? maybe gemma and the car both fell in and were frozen (since everything in SEVERANCE apparently happens in the wintertime, lol)
i mean, it wouldn't surprise me if we learn that the car accident was "arranged" by lumon??? (either purely to harvest bodies or potentially if gemma turns out to have been involved in anti-eagan stuff on the DL) but idk, i don't love the idea cos i don't like it when shows try to tie LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE THING together into the big overarching mystery, y'know? like, some things are really just down to dumb luck and chance
i also don't think miss casey herself is a clone of gemma, so either her body was WAY less fucked up by the car crash physically than we might otherwise think, or lumon has some top-secret super-healing tech on the testing floor. maybe both!
ANYWAY, remember "allentown"? mark s's first-day fluke, where he completed a file in one day? that was him refining gemma into miss casey the first time around. YADDA YADDA LOVE TRANSCENDS SEVERANCE he literally put the splintered icy fragments of his dead wife back together again because she LIVES IN HIS VEINS guys. and now he's doing it AGAIN with cold harbor. this is why lumon was so desperate to keep him around even while they fired irving and dylan at the drop of a hat: they know he can get the job done, ESPECIALLY when it comes to working on gemma/miss casey. (see also: mark w commenting about how his team from the branch that shut down never made quota)
i've seen the idea tossed around that all the refiners are assigned to someone who was emotionally close to their outie (e.g. irving's deceased father) but i really don't think that's the case -- like, dylan says mark's freshman fluke let lumon devise new techniques for refining to cut down on the time it takes to finish a file, and istg i can see it perfectly in my head: cobel asking mark s how the FUCK he managed to do that and him just being like "i don't know, the numbers looked...scary??????" and her just. rolling with it.
(also i feel like that's why dylan's generally a good refiner -- he can read people! his outie knew what to say and how to act to impress the door factory guy in s2e2!)
so lumon really really needs cold harbor to work. if it's not because they care about gemma SPECIFICALLY for some secret reason, it must be that they care about the technique. lumon (i.e. the board and/or the eagan family), like so many corporate overlords before them, are selling immortality.
i'm on the fence about whether they're trying to resurrect/immortalize kier eagan specifically -- like it would make the most thematic sense, and they have a ton of material FROM his life certainly to work with, but he's supposed to have died in 1939 and cryonics tech just wasn't advanced enough at the time. but also the world of SEVERANCE is pretty distinct from our own so i guess it's plausible
i feel much more confident in saying they're trying to get the technique working specifically for the sake of current ceo jame eagan, who is an old decrepit fart. imo the "revolving" he mentions to helly in the s1 finale is key to this -- like, it kind of sounds like eagan-speak for rotating through/swapping into a new body???
this MIGHT be where the idea of cloning becomes involved, which i can see supported by the emphasis in the s2 opening credits on babies (including baby kier at the end ofc), but i also just had the even more fucked up thought that what if the end goal is to upload the eagans' personalities (and those of their chosen cronies) into the bodies of severed workers. hence the continued necessity for a severed working underclass as well as their ruling higher-ups -- it's a body farm, an endless cycle of severed workers toiling away to let the rich live on and then having their bodies/minds/souls co-opted when they've lost their other utility. oh my god helly was right THEY LITERALLY ARE LIVESTOCK
guys holy shit what if the season ends with jame (or KIER) eagan's personality getting uploaded into miss casey's chip and overwriting miss casey (and also gemma?? idk i feel like mark scout/mark s are both going to have to come to terms with the idea that gemma as she was is capital-g Gone, even if her body and brain are still sort of alive). and then season 3 has dichen lachman chewing the scenery as creepy old man eagan. I THINK IT WOULD BE FUN AND ALSO FUCKED UP
okay so what about cobel, right? like, obviously she's been drinking the eagan kool-aid, she is All In on immortalizing kier (or jame or whoever). but there's more to it than that!!! she's the one harping on about reintegration being real and possible, AND she's desperate seeking for any signs of it during mark s and miss casey's wellness sessions. why? cobel wants to revive her mother charlotte (we see her medical tag on cobel's eagan shrine), but she wants HER MOTHER, not a blank slate -- in other words she's rooting for the chips to not function properly in order to truly resurrect someone who's been dead
in particular i think this is why she flipped her lid on mark at the end of s2e2 when he asked what she knew about gemma -- like, idk maybe it's confirmation bias at play but to me her primal scream felt like it was coming from a place of...jealousy? like, "how DARE you ask me that, how are YOU the one who's allowed to get your loved one back and I'M being promoted up the ladder so lumon can get me out of the way even though MY motivations are pure". that kind of thing
cobel's attitude towards lumon and helena in s2e2 is SUUUUUUPER ambiguous -- i think she's going to turn from outright enemy into kind of a weird "enemy of my enemy is my friend" thing this season?? especially since i got the feeling that she really did kind of care about mark and devon in her own supremely weird, fucked-up way
oh god you guys. what if her "mrs selvig" persona was cobel imitating her own mother, mid-atlantic accent and corny outdated references to clark gable and all. FUCK
also the fact that she's looking for miss casey and mark s to remember each other implies that reintegration is possible even without outside interference with the chip itself (i.e. however reghabi reintegrated petey). and you know what?
i think she's right.
THE BIG BOY THEORY: MARK SCOUT AND MARK S WILL START TO SPONTANEOUSLY REINTEGRATE THIS SEASON
i will live and die on this hill, ben stiller i swear to FUCK
what's the overriding symbolism in the season 1 opening credits?? the line between innie and outie is porous (or "mushy", if you will). black sludge seeping from the trash cans that's made of all your other selves (also reflecting how irving dreams of his outie's black paint). mark's innie and outie selves constantly chasing circles around one another until at the end they both collapse on the bed...and then collapse together as a single person.
what's the overriding symbolism in the season 2 opening credits???? not just "mark scout, i.e. mark in red pajamas, delving into lumon's mysteries", not just "mushy confusion of innie and outie feelings re: helly and miss casey" -- mark's innie and outie selves working together. innie mark pulling outie mark out of the severance chip. innie mark hoisting up the curtain dividing outer and inner worlds to let outie mark through. innie mark CARRYING OUTIE MARK IN HIS ARMS. do you see the fucking vision.
of course that's also coupled with the final image of the credits: mark bursting through and out of his own head. which i think emphasizes that there's going to be conflict as well as cooperation between mark's disparate selves (especially when it comes to everything involving the helly/mark/casey love triangle)
why did mark look like he was having a goddamn seizure when he was coming down the elevator. why did he glimpse a mysterious figure following him in the hallway. WHY THE FUCK WAS HIS VERY FIRST INSTINCT TO BOLT FOR WELLNESS AND LOOK FOR MISS CASEY!!!!! (okay this could also conceivably be due to him yelling to devon that she was alive literally one second ago but still)
i think mark's "spontaneous reintegration" is also more or less an insane fluke, basically a product of the fact that he's now working on gemma/miss casey's refinement data AGAIN and both his innie and outie selves are starting to blur together regarding their shock and turmoil over the realization that gemma is alive (and probably loads of other stuff too while we're at it).
but idk, maybe spontaneous reintegration also occurs naturally over time? irving is also having some bleed-through and iirc he's been at lumon the longest of all of them
shit dude. what if outie burt ALSO has bleed-through and that's why he followed irving and was crying. honestly what the fuck was even the deal with that, i don't know!!!!
anyway i imagine that "spontaneous reintegration" would really put a kibosh in lumon's plans to permanently rewire and wipe the brains of severed folks in order to pave the way for an immortal ruling class. also i thought the way they did petey's hallucinatory flip-flopping between his lives/selves was awesome and i would like more of that, please. (also: i miss petey, y'all)
i think if they do end up going this route it's gonna be spoonfed to us pretty slowly though -- like, s2 will slowly build up the mystery of "what the fuck's going on with mark reintegrating", then s3 is his two selves coming to terms with...All Of That
those are all of my big idea theories but i also have some smaller bullet points to address:
dylan's gonna visit his family in the """visitation suite""" and it 100% is going to be paid lumon actors. and the giveaway is gonna come at the end of the episode when we cut back to outie dylan's life and his wife (or one of his other kids, who knows) is terminally sick (maybe wheelchair- or bed-bound?), hence outie dylan's desperation to find another job post-firing
that is one million percent helena eagan down on the severed floor (although i can see the argument for it being helly r and she's just not comfortable sharing her real experience on the outside). her shady story aside, i think britt lower is CRUSHING IT as "helena pretending to be helly but it's kind of off-putting and fake because it's helena's idea of how helly would behave". like, it's giving me the same vibes as in FRINGE when fauxlivia pretends to be olivia and then seduces/sleeps with peter. real ones know
RICKEN IS NOT A FUCKING SECRET EAGAN!!!!!! DEVON IS NOT SECRETLY IN ON ANYTHING (besides keeping her brother safe)!!!!!! HIS FRIENDS ARE JUST PRETENTIOUS SHITHEELS!!!!!!!!!!!!
as much as i would literally chew glass (positive) for mark s and miss casey to be A Thing, i feel like narratively and thematically it's not gonna work with the show's overarching themes of like, struggling to process grief and selfhood and figuring out what makes you you (or someone else their own independent self). gemma is Gone and you can't bring her back and you can't cut yourself off from the grief and the pain. mark has to reintegrate (literally and metaphorically/emotionally) in order to resolve his issues and move on
this show is so!!!!!! OOOOOUUUUGGGGHHGHGHH
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asmogorna · 5 months ago
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Okay so there’s this ww artist on ig called like tooth lilys or something and he’s always causing drama in the ww fandom and he mouthed off about your art and now heaps of insta ww fans are like talking about you :| free publicity?
ahhhh so thats whats happening .. lmao thats crazy
i checked out their story, and i sure doooo love how they leave some things out when talking about both situations that they mentioned to make me look worse ..
ok so
warning, yap session incoming
the "will wood in a (miku) binder" thing happened back in fall 2023 when i was still semi new to the fandom and didnt know a lot of things. so tho i to this day i dont think it was that big of a deal, i wouldnt do it today
it was an artwork made for shits and giggles, the context of which i have explained here before. i never meant to imply that will wood is trans and i certainly dont "headcanon" him as that. my curse is that even when joking around i tend to try and make my art look good, so i get why people thought it was unironic. and i know that it sounds like a lame ass excuse, but it legit didnt cross my mind that people would think i drew will wood as a trans guy or smth. legit my only thought process was "funny haha internet thing" + "my favorite thing" = "good idea"
now the usage of his real name is something i am genuinely sorry for, but it was an accident and a genuine mistake on my part. i remember seeing someone mention it casually in some comment section, and assuming that it was ok, since i didnt know he was in any way against it. (i also thought that it was the same name that he used in "the real will wood" in that one section cus it sounded a bit similar).
when i was informed about the fact that he doesnt want it spread around i deleted the post right away and apologized, so bringing it up like something i did on purpose and out of malicious intent is a tad bit .. misfitting, if you can use that word
now the hot topic of the day: my waywood art
i have said this before and i will say this again, how i feel about rpf is solely based off how the people involved feel about it
to clarify: i never drew anything inappropriate or even suggestive with them, the "worst" thing is 2 simple sketches of them smoochin. or. this.
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idk if this is what they were referring to when talking about me drawing will wood and gerard way "making out" (specifically. because i think "making out" implies to be more sexual stuff than small kisses). and if so, then it once again feels like blowing things out of proportion
and now the point i want you to get: will wood wouldnt give a flying fuck
like i said earlier, i never drew anything inappropriate, because that would actually cross will's existent and real boundaries. you know, the ones that he stated
im not making some conspiracy theories about him being gay, like some people seem to imply in their inbox messages to me
im not sending a whole ass smut fanfiction to litwtc gmail or something, i dont bother him in instagram dms asking if he wants to fuck gerard way, im not shipping him with people who he actually knows personally and has to look in the eyes of from time to time
im not doing anything that he would actually care about
him and chris have joked about him being attracted to gerard before, and though im not saying that you can joke about everything theyve ever joked about, i feel like in our case its clear that will clearly doesnt care about the implications ? (i generally believe that ww fans would get their panties twisted about less things if more of them listened to what these 2 talk about so calmly on litwtc but i digress)
if he saw that some random teenager on tumblr is drawing him and gerard way (gasp of horror) holding hands, he'd laugh at it max and then move on with his day
people are treating the whole situation like i posted pictures of him from when he was a kid or leaked patreon content or drew him fully naked or anything else that, you know, would actually affect him in one way or another
what im doing is innocent fun which isnt even likely to reach either of them. will wood very rarely checks tumblr and, once again, i genuinely dont believe he would care. and gerard way aint got no internet + he doesnt care x 2
it is weird but rn this is what brings me the most joy, even if its silly to say. both will wood and gerard way mean a lot to me and putting them in situations together makes me happy. i am but a child full of fun whimsy
i wont be posting any more explicitly romantic art to avoid more drama, and i also wont be responding to all the anon messages i received because there are like .. too many of them. an overwhelming amount i'd say. sorry about that
i really didnt mean to cause such a fuss, and i understand why some people might be uncomfortable with what i do
i fully understand why you would dislike my waywood hyperfixation shenanigans, and i dont have a problem w you over that, but treating me like pure evil because of a thing so insignificant is just.. overdoing it
once again, i will be toning it down, but it really isnt the end of the world if i dare to draw will wood and gerard way being a tad bit gay (which is, i apparently need to mention, not me actually saying that will wood the alternative musician is a homosexual gay who is in a genuine for real actual real gay homosexual relationship with gerard fucking way the lead singer of my chemical romance. i think speculating on other people's sexuality and gender identity is boooo tomato tomato tomato)
sorry for the rant and sorry to all who were disappointed by my lack of remorse. come back in a couple years when i turn 18 and stop having fun and artistic freedom
thank you for your attention and i hope i at least cleared some things up to those who werent w me throughout every event where i get involved in fandom drama
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bye bye
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pollsnatural · 3 months ago
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1) Jack was introduced as an important plot point in Cas' storyline, from the very beginning his story was supposed to be tightly connected to Cas'. But I suppose execs thought that having Misha and Alex in the episodes together was luxury (and we can't even think about making an episode where Jensen and Jared aren't involved) which led to rare interactions between Cas and Jack which is deeply disappointing.
2) The same as 1.
3) They tried to do that in season 5 while making him a parallel to Bobby's disability, but in the end both of them just got better lmao. After that Cas losing his powers and gaining them was used mainly as a crutch to the main storylines.
4) Self-explanatory, I think
5) This is going to be complicated. Most likely it's just a me problem. Yes, there's charm to Cas being a total loser. Yes, trying to accept yourself beyond your usefullness is a theme. Yes, I get it. But. It feels bad. He's an autistic-coded character to whom I relate a lot. Because of my autism many people think that I'm incompetent, that I'm unable to do any job, that I'm too uhh child-like for it. And through Cas it seems to me that show says "yeah, lol, you're a loser, you can't do anything yourself, you should just give up and let others do your job". Like it's totally connected to my personal problems and to how I interpret the character, but if we're talking about lore of the show, shouldn't he be one of the most effective soldiers of Heaven? Why does he lose all his skills? I'm sure not all of them were connected to his angelic powers. And if they were, couldn't writers let him learn new skills? I just want the show to give him a little more dignity.
6) I just want what Dean fans have - lots of boyfriends/girlfriends for Cas.
7) If you're burying gays, don't be pussies about it. The "yeah, he's here in the Heaven" undermined Cas' sacrifice for no good reason.
8) If you can't have Misha in the episode, at least think of the fun explanation for Cas' absence. Like "Yeah, sorry, I wasn't in the last episode because had to fight aliens", idk.
9) I just want more drama. Moriah was good, but I want more.
10) The idea of Godstiel cults existing after season 7 is sexy to me.
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bonny-kookoo · 2 years ago
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Yoonkook x Reader
Touch-Starved [Main Story]
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Yoongi has a crush on you, but is convinced you're not interested in him. You have a crush on Yoongi, but are sure that he'd never like you if he knew your secret. Jungkook has a crush on you but won't admit it to anyone, and you have a crush on Jungkook, but you think you know that he'd never see you as a possible partner, because he knows your secret. It's all just such a mess. How could you ever sort this out?
Tags/Warnings: Wolf!Bangtan, Wolf!Jungkook, Wolf!Yoongi, Dog!Reader, Puppy!Reader, DDLG aspects and themes, no judgement allowed here, non-sexual regression!!!, none of those themes are sexualized in this work, hurt and comfort, major fluff but also lots of angst and insecurity, friends to lovers
Length: idk long didn't count
-> Masterlist
There is no taglist for this fic.
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Yoongi is not good at things like affection, or relationships at that.
He easily turns red as bright as a spanked ass whenever he has to try and compliment someone he's even just remotely romantically interested in, or he will otherwise simply not find the courage to do it at all. Backhanded compliments are a regular thing with him, his character not allowing him to show someone he cares without implying that he doesn't- a trait that he hates about himself.
He'd learned it from his father, making him even more upset since he never really got along well with that man in the first place. Yet the more he thinks about it, the more it seems like his family history will just repeat itself, and he will find himself in a marriage simply created because of convenience, not love.
He cringes at that, throwing the rest of his sandwich away. His appetite has been long gone anyways.
The reason of his foul mood is in the dorm currently, sitting comfortably on the couch playfully wrestling with Jungkook over a pack of chips he can't identify from his spot.
He hates Jungkook sometimes.
He's always pictured as a shy boy, yet he's actually the exact opposite - easily likable, charming, and most of all- he's your age. The maknae and you are merely half a year apart in age, and he can see why you get along with him. He is a nice person, with his bright smile and large eyes, talented, strong, and likes video games as much as you do.
Yoongi himself does play some games to a small extend, however, he rather buries himself in his work, losing sense of time whenever music is involved.
Overly confident is not how he would describe you- you are simply uncaring of trends of the masses. You don't crave to stand out like Taehyung does, you rather enjoy simply living for yourself and what makes you happy no matter what people would think of your 'goals'. You love stuffed animals and soft colorful things no matter how childish it might make you look. You rarely take selfies of yourself, and never really pose much in images- you just smile, simple as that.
God that smile. If there is an emotion for hate and love at the same time, he is constantly feeling it when it comes to you.
Yoongi wants to be close to you as well, maybe even the closest if he is honest, yet he doesn't know how the hell he is supposed to do that. You both rarely text- he is too unsure if he can, since he is only in a groupchat with you, and only got your ID from Hoseok, who gave it to him in case Yoongi needs to text you something important. You rarely visit him in his studio, but then again, he never told you you'd be welcome anytime. Every small thing he does for you he either brushes it off as nothing speci¹al, or sometimes even tells you that he didn't do it, but one of his members, claiming that he has no Idea what you are talking about. You also show absolutely no interest in him whatsoever.
Which makes his embarrassing crush on you all the more awkward.
He's Min Yoongi for god's sake! He could have anyone if he really tried, if just for his fame and wealth and status as a full blooded Wolf-Hybrid coming from a 'clean' bloodline- yet he is stuck with you, the tiny dog hybrid who sees him as a friend only- if even that at all.
"Yoongi! Finally leaving your wife in there to join us in being social for once?" Seokjin remarks with his signature laugh following, making you chuckle as well.
"Don't be mean Jin." You softly scold the oldest. "Yoongs works hard in there." You look over your shoulder, one of your floppy ears unfolding while you smile that goddamn smile at him- not huge, not a smirk, simply a nice friendly gesture towards him, curled tail wagging a little.
The nickname doesn't make it better.
He hates nicknames, however, he could definitely keep living with your cute versions of his first name any day of the week. He wants to answer you, give you a verbal response, yet all he can bring himself to do is a shrug of his shoulders.
What the fuck.
But you only playfully hold your heart, falling into Jungkooks lap with a dramatic sigh. "Ah, always so cold-!" Which makes the guys laugh, and himself involuntarily smile to himself. He sits down, managing to actually place his ass next to you on the couch without instantly retreating for once. You bravely put your legs over his lap, and his mind is beginning to form the same amount of error messages like his PC system the last time he spilled his iced americano over his MIDI-board.
Yet he only grunts on the outside, and takes his phone out to search for something.
You chuckle, mumbling a sorry under your breath and move to slide your legs off of him again, but his unused hand stops them, shifting them back. His fingers are touching the small patch of bare skin on your calf between your leggings and fluffy sock that had slid down a little- and he has to use all of his self-control not to burst into flames.
He's never really had any very close contact with you, and always imagined what your skin may feel like- as creepy as that sounds. The smile he can see you forming from the side of his view makes him relax, as well- the first sign spotted that he might have some sort of effect on you. Taehyung makes a noise, but is silenced by namjoon who pulls him into a conversation to avoid embarrassing the producer, well aware of his own personal dilemma with you. He is the only one who really knows of his feelings towards you- having told yoongi that you actually feel the same way, yet a bit different. You are, according to namjoon, scared to overstep boundaries with Yoongi, worried that he may snap at you like he did a few months back.
There's that certain feeling whenever you do something stupid and then want to apologize, but you miss the chance and now weeks after it's just awkward, so you don't mention it, while also having to deal with the consequences daily.
Yeah. He still thinks of that moment he'd yelled at you sometimes at the most random of times, cringing internally at it. He'd been stressed with the new Album he wanted to put out, having been stuck on one song, and you had just turned up at the wrong time. You didn't cry or anything like that, you simply apologized for opening his studio without knocking, and left with your tail tucked between your legs. Since then however you'd become a bit more distant with him, more careful, and less touchy than you were with the rest of the pack.
He knows you're a sucker for skinship and cuddling, especially as a dog hybrid who's grown up in a carecenter between many other hybrids, yet you also respect if someone wants space. He loves how much attention you pay to your surroundings, eyes always wide open- you remember things for a long time, and you are able to keep track of so many things at once- yet he's also seen your apartment, a glimpse of your more raw personal side that you tend to keep close to yourself. You're a chaotic person, and he doesn't know how you find anything on that desk of yours.
You struggle to keep track of chores and your own health sometimes, yet you try hard, he knows that. And that makes him feel such an extreme need to make sure you're always happy and taken care of, that he's the one to take care of you.
"Oh, YOONGI!" You suddenly gasp at him, and he raises his eyebrows, looking at you as you move around a bit, your hands searching in your sweater pocket for something. "I actually cleaned up my apartment yesterday, and I found this. I think I borrowed it sometime ago, but lost it- sorry for that again by the way, won't happen again I promise!" You say, showing him a black and silver USB stick, your curly tail wagging in excitement.
You're right, that is his. He actually had forgotten about it.
"Took you long enough." He simply says and takes it from you to put it in his own pocket, seconds later cringing at his sentence. He could've definitely phrased that better, or maybe even simply thank you for giving it back even after all this time. Yet the timeframe of saying thank you without making it seem weird or out of place is already overstepped now, so he has to suffer.
Jungkook chimes in instead.
"I helped her get some order back into that place. Poor puppy had been so stressed with work that she couldnt keep up anymore." He says, laughing along with you, and Yoongi lets a chuckle of his own slip. But instead of telling you what a good job you did, or any praise he really wants to tell you, he only pats your leg gently two times, running his thumb over your calf for a second, internally imprinting into his mind how soft your skin is.
You however beam at this, visibly feeding off of his small gesture like a touch starved pet- and he can't help but find it cute.
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A knock on his door makes him look at it, giving a verbal response in a low "Hm?", as he hears your voice from behind it.
You're not really saying anything, just a sound of confusion and discomfort escaping you from behind the door, and he can slowly hear your slippers softly moving away, when he gets up from his chair to open his door to see you stop to look at him. You're standing in front of him with wide eyes and lowered ears, one of them being pulled on by your hand as he can hear the rest of the pack laughing in the main living room of the dorm. He chuckles at that, waving you into his studio, making him and yourself smile. You thank him somewhat quietly, and go to sit down on his small couch he has inside his studio, laying down so your feet still touched the ground as to not overstep any unspoken rules he might have.
Yoongi however walks up to you, and puts your feet up for you, grabbing a spare blanket from besides the couch, something he always kept here since he sleeps in his studio quite often. You thank him quietly for that, the soft buzzing of his studio PC and the nice air conditioning already helping your fuzzy head a lot.
Jumping over your shadow and coming here was a good idea after all, it seems like.
Yoongi sympathizes with you when it comes to headaches- and it's clear from your behavior that you probably have one, which could also explain why you don't really talk, since it probably hurts. Due to the fact that he seems to solely survive off of caffeine and a cup of instant ramen smashed in between his busy schedule, he gets them more often than he would like to admit. Yet he also remembers how you'd told him once how easily your headaches evolved into migraines if you weren't careful, so he is mindful to help you in avoiding that this time. He digs around in his mind for any small excuse to talk to you, yet ultimately decides against it, thinking it would probably be better for you to have as much silence as possible.
He wonders what your secret is.
Namjoon had mentioned something you kept secret 'for a reason', but he wouldn't tell the producer what it could be, not even a hint. You hopefully know that nothing could ever really make Yoongi see you any different than he does right now.
Except maybe murder- but he doubts that that's what you're hiding.
He also knows that Jungkook is aware of it too. Maybe you both are a couple? He does sleep over sometimes after all, seems to be awfully good with calming you down whenever you're anxious or panicking. It's like the young wolf is aware or something Yoongi isn't, able to manage you when you're becoming restless about things.
Another knock is heard. Yoongi attempts to call out- but gets up to walk to the door instead so he won't shout and worsen your headache. It's Jungkook- because of course it is.
"Hey- is- oh, there she is. I was wondering where she went " jungkook says, entering after the rapper walks aside, silently giving him permission to come in. "Hey- everything okay?" Jungkook wonders softly to you, and you quietly shake your head, whining slightly to yourself before you pull down your ears once more over your eyes, clearly signaling your headache to him as well. "I told you to drink more, puppy. Come on, let's get you home." He gently says, helping you sit up.
"She can just nap here, I don't mind." Yoongi offers- but there's something in Jungkook's eyes that seems oddly suspicious as he looks for an answer inside his head it seems like.
"Ah, I'll rather take her home, but thanks hyung." He tells him, averting his gaze as he instead occupies himself with you who's silently reaching out for him, clinging onto him as he picks you up, showing clearly how used to it both of you are. Jungkook holds you almost effortlessly, while you're instinctively laying your head on his shoulder, arms around his neck.
Yeah, you're probably a couple, and you just don't want to say it out loud.
"You know, you could just tell everyone." Yoongi grumbles more or less as he opens the door for the two of you, Jungkooks wide eyes looking at him. "No one's gonna get mad or something if you told them." He shrugs, and Jungkook looks around for a second, on edge. "You're together, right?" He asks, and Jungkook shakes his head- though with a hint of shyness in his face.
"Ah no- hyung.." He sighs. "I'll- she'll explain when she's ready okay?" He says, as you whine into his neck. "I have to bring her home now- thanks for looking after her!" He says already walking away-
leaving Yoongi confused.
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Jungkook honestly wishes you and him were a couple.
But life doesn't work like this, and sadly, you're not into him like that. You see him as a comfort person, a packmate and a friend- but nothing more than that. He remembers when he first 'caught' you in the midst of regressing in your home-
the whole apartment a mess, cluttered and absolutely disorganized.
You're one of only three percent of dog hybrids that fall into a different headspace when stressed or overwhelmed. It's not something you can control, and neither is it a trauma response- it's just nature playing a cruel joke on you, making your mind shut down to a certain degree to protect you. It's like your brain is overprotective- trying to shield you from all potential mental harm.
But all of that comes with a lot of issues and troubles, such as difficulty holding a job, or simple things such as keeping your apartment clean.
Jungkook remembers how terrified you were of him finding you in your messy apartment- having had to calm you down for a good hour or so before he could even attempt at helping you clean up and take care of your needs. He's not sure why you're so adamant on hiding it from the rest of the pack- but he's got an idea.
Dog hybrids with your condition are alienated, isolated, judged terribly. And you're probably terrified of being cast out of the pack for it, leaving you alone and without anybody.
Your personal nightmare.
So he just instead has decided to take care of you, and wait until you feel ready to tell someone else. You deserve happiness and the feeling of safety and comfort, but he can also understand that you're worried of how it'll be taken by the rest of the guys.
And yeah, he also gets to be a little selfish himself when he's got time with you like this. He gets to live out a little dream here and there, where you're actually his to love. Because he does love you, to the moon and back- and he knows his heart will surely break a little one day when you find someone to give your own heart to, instead of him.
So he takes these moments for himself, and enjoys those daydreams for now, until he has to wake up.
"There we go, that's already better isn't it?" Jungkook hums after he'd taken out your hairtie, fingers massaging the spot where it had been pressing against your scalp for the past few hours. You hum in agreement, nodding against his shoulder while you move a bit to get comfortable on his thighs.
You don't even know that you almost exposed your secret to Yoongi of all people- the one wolf of the pack you've got a crush on.
Everyone kind of knows it, everyone also knows about his crush on you as well- though you seem rather talented in finding excuse after excuse as to why that can't be true. Jungkook knows your main fear is what you're right now- and that Yoongi could find you appalling, or childish, or anything else negative that could come to your mind.
And Jungkook can't say he doesn't understand your fear- because he does.
"You're gonna get all stiff if you nap like that." Jungkook chuckles, patting your back a little, making your curled tail wag happily. "Don't be a brat now. Come on, we'll take a nap on the couch, yeah?" He hums. You whine. "No? Not a nap?" He wonders, but you nod now. "Okay, yes to a nap, no to the couch?" He navigates, laughing when you nod now, tail wagging. "Puppy if we nap in bed you'll sleep for hours though." He sighs.
But you simply wiggle out of his lap, before you run to the bedroom-
The wolf hot on your heels, when your doorbell rings.
When Jungkook opens the door, it's Yoongi- the producer holding up a jacket. "She left it at the dorm." He informs Jungkook, who reaches out to take it- though Yoongi holds it back. "I'd like to give it to her myself-"
"You can't." The younger wolf denies, panicking a little when he hears something jingle, and feels the toy hit his back softly, fabric ball tumbling to the ground, bell inside the cotton filling the cause of the noise. Jungkook closes the door a bit more now to keep you out of sight. "Just- uh, she'll grab it tomorrow-"
"Her phone and purse are in the pockets." Yoongi says. "I'm sure she'd like it back right now." He challenges, and Jungkook can feel himself squirm uncomfortably under the strong gaze of his packmate, having to avert his gaze. "What's really going on?" Yoongi asks, as the toy hits Jungkook's back again.
"Look, this is really bad timing right now-" Jungkook whines as he kicks the toy back with his food go occupy you at least for just a second to give himself more time to think of an excuse. "-She's.. not feeling well right now." He tries to justify.
"Jungkook you're not being very convincing right now." Yoongi sighs. "What the fuck is going on? Does she hate me?"
"NO!" Jungkook barks, before he pinches the bridge of his nose. "Ah.. God, fuck, alright." He sighs, defeated, letting the door slowly open more, while he turns around to throw the soft fabric ball towards where you sit on the floor, toy flying over your head, making you flop onto your back as you try to catch it.
You don't even realize it's Yoongi who's now in the doorway whole Jungkook sits in front of you to start a game of tug-of-war with the soft llushy toy with you, successfully pulling your attention away from the producer who just silently enters the apartment, and closes the door behind him before he hangs up your coat.
It takes him one good look to realize what's going on.
The hazy look in your eyes. The way you don't even greet him, rather occupied with the game Jungkook plays with you. Your almost clumsy way of movement.
"So that's the secret?" Yoongi hums as he sits down near his packmate, watching you with an unreadable expression.
Jungkook nods. "She's scared of anyone finding out." He reveals, while he watches you now nibbling on his finger instead of the toy, before you yawn.
"Why?" Yoongi wonders. "It's not like it's her fault or choice." He mumbles.
"Yeah, I know." Jungkook shrugs. "But I get it, you know? You hear horror stories about it all the time. Friends and family being weirded out and stuff." He explains, and Yoongi grows quiet.
It really is understandable.
"So that's why you sleep over so much?" He asks, and the younger wolf nods.
"She used to be triggered easily since she didn't have a person to rely on." He explains. "But when I took on that.. role, I guess, she became more stable. It doesn't happen so randomly anymore, she's got more control over it. Today was just a bad day I guess." He shrugs.
"She must be tough to handle." Yoongi mumbles.
"Not really." Jungkook denies. "She's very sweet. The beginning was hard, yeah, but mostly because I didn't know what to do. These days it's become easier." He nods to himself, though Yoongi doesn't miss the look on his friend's face.
"You love her." He states.
And Jungkook only nods.
"I do." He agrees. "It's hard not to."
Yoongi hums in agreement, and Jungkook wants to be swallowed by the ground. Now that the producer knows, he'll take over the care of you- you'll grow closer, emotionally and physically, and you'll no longer need Jungkook to care for you.
His dream is ending, and he hates it.
"She loves you too." Yoongi offers. Jungkook laughs a little.
"Situationally, yeah." He nods.
"No, in general." Yoongi argues, but he can't seem to push through the thoughts of Jungkooks mind, the wolf having already decided his stance on things. "Jungkook.."
"You'll take good care of her, right?" He asks, looking at his packmate with round eyes that try hard not to let any tears fall. "You'll make sure she doesn't have to.. feel ashamed, or bad, right?"
"I'm not taking her away from you." Yoongi shakes his head, and Jungkook nods.
"I know you're not." He says, trying hard to keep it together even as you crawl into his lap to comfort him, sensing his distress.
"She was never mine to begin with."
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You're absolutely mortified when you're informed of what happened- or rather when you connected the dots yourself, after waking from your nap with both wolves next to you in bed.
One look exchanged with Jungkook signals to him that you've pulled yourself out of your headspace- body shaking now with the overwhelming sense of shame you're feeling as Yoongi sits up now as well to look at you with a sense of worry.
"Hey, it's fine." Jungkook reassures easily. "He doesn't hate you or anything, he's cool with it."
"Oh god this is so weird.." you hide your face in your hands, embarrassed by the events unfolding like this.
"Its not. It makes sense, really." Yoongi shrugs. "So this is why you don't want to move into the pack dorm with us?" He wonders, and you nod.
"Its weird. You can say that, I know myself that it is." You sigh.
"You're not weird." Jungkook shakes his head, taking your hand to reassure you. "Promise."
"I agree. This isn't weird, it's something that happens to some." He shrugs. "I still like you." He says without thinking, as you slowly look at him.
"You.. do?" You wonder, and he nods.
"Very much." He smiles a bit awkwardly, when Jungkook let's go of your hand, clearing his throat.
"I'll.. I'll see myself out then." He mumbles, and at that your head snaps towards him.
No- he can't leave like that. Yoongi might've..somewhat confessed, but you still need him. You still want him here.
Wait.
If Yoongi likes you, and toy like him back, and that leads to you Noth becoming partners, that's great. But if that means you can't have Jungkook, you don't want it. You need jungkook.
You love jungkook, too.
"Hey, Yoongi will stay with you, you're not alone anymore-" He tries to settle your clearly bubbling panic, but its to no avail. Your head is filled with the fact that Jungkook wants to leave, and you don't want that.
You want both. Why can't they both stay?
Your cheeks are wet with tears as your puppy-mind refuses to accept the situation. You've slipped right back again, as you make jungkook hold yoongis hand, before you yourself hold onto them, stubbornly holding onto their connected hands, before you lay down on them, eyes closed and ears pinned back.
"I uh.." Jungkook stampers a big awkwardly, attempt at pulling his hand away responded to with a low growl from you, eyes glaring.
"Seems like we'll have to share." Yoongi teases surprisingly, catching the younger wolf off guard as hemeeys the older one's gaze.
"I mean- uh-" he stammers, unsure. "Is that.. will that even work out?" He worries, while you happily fall asleep hiding both their hands.
"Guess we'll have to find out." Yoongi shrugs, laying down again next to you, Jungkook slowly doing the same a few seconds later.
Looks like his dream didn't end after all-
Maybe it just begun.
♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥
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comicbookgirl2 · 3 months ago
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Theories about poppy playtime chapter 1-4:
Spoilers ahead!
1st theory: poppy left the safe haven because she went to reason with the prototype/send the letter (hence why it tells us to find the flower and why a word is misspelled. Ofcourse you could argue that it’s him using her as bait to lure in any employees to kill them but why misspell the word? Seems like something a child would do and not someone posing as a fellow employee)
BUT I DIGRESS- I believe that when she met with him, he told her his plan that involved something heinous and in an act of desperation she was the one who sent us the letter just before being imprisoned in the case. Unbeknownst to her while being imprisoned the prototype intercepted the letter but still allowed it to be sent specifically to you (hence why he’s been stalking us from chapter 2 (or maybe even 1))
Ok bear with me for a second: when you free poppy at the end of chapter 1 she never seems shocked that you’re there at the factory. In fact she knows who you are (an ex employee) and correctly deduces that you probably came back for your colleagues.
Then there’s the fact that Harley knew about the note as well- how would he have known? My guess is that the prototype told him and they were expecting you to return- probably not to make it that far but to still return nonetheless.
2nd theory: whatever secret the prototype and Harley was seeking to achieve- has been successfully achieved.
Not much theory for this, but I think if the prototype needed Harley then there’s no way he would’ve just sat there and let you killed him. Not unless he
A) already had gotten what he wanted from Harley
Or
B) Harley is not entirely dead (not saying this will happen but it seems like sort of a stretch? Idk he did say he’d bury himself so far down no one would find him)
3rd theory (and arguably weakest one): a human worked with the prototype and Harley to initiate the hour of joy. Even the warden pointed out how only 4 people with the level of security clearance/executive access could’ve made the hour of joy possible and even Sawyer seems to agree- hinting at conspirators being within the company and not external.
So who could it have been?
My guess
Stella Greyber.
Think about it. From the 4 people given we can automatically cross off two.
Leith (because he would have to deal with the fall out and did try to send special extraction teams back) and the warden. So that leaves Stella and Rittenhouse. Ofcourse between the two Rittenhouse seems far more the shady one likely to backstab someone. So why would I say Stella?
I believe that Rittenhouse is too deeply invested in this company to just throw it all away, from outright threatening Warrenbach (probably killing him too) to even casually stating how they make people disappear- he has loyalty to the bottom line. To profit. So why betray the company when we see that he doesn’t really have a motive to do so.
And from the tape between her and Leith she admits to being uncomfortable about the process but seemingly agrees to it under the notion of it helping a lot of people someday. But if you listen closely you can hear something, perphaps boxy boo breathing in the background- to me I think this was the last chance Leith was giving her. She had to think carefully here otherwise she too would disappear. So she told him what she wanted to hear just to live a little longer.
After all, if she still sympathizes with the children perphaps she too could be easily swayed by someone like poppy (who we knew was involved albeit ill informed) but perphaps she didn’t know that it would end in the death of both innocent and guilty. Maybe she just thought the toys were going to leave or do something else.
I feel as if we’ve been following her for a while and that it’s little by little been building up to something. We see her nutty philosophy on immortality (strange how she asked Leith if ‘it was ready yet’) we see how the company isn’t prepared to throw her to the wolves when it wants to (testing a kid she had prepared for adoption) and now we see her willingly take part in it. Could it be the tale of someone good becoming complacent with evil? Or something else?
But then again, I could also see Rittenhouse betraying the company as well if perphaps a rival company offered him something better. After all he shows little to no restraint when it comes to getting what he wants.
4th theory: the orphans are undergoing the same experiment that the rat in poppy gel was. So they’re all currently emerged in poppy gel.
I have zero evidence for this. But the presence of poppy flowers in front of the lab is very suspicious.
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chaifootsteps · 9 months ago
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it's pretty funny Blitz is painted as this bad partner when that fits Stolas a lot better
the worst Blitz has done is what he did to Verosika (stealing from her and running off) and the rest seem to be one night stands or just being rude to/insulting people (which is pretty standard for Hell, idk why Blitz is the only one getting heat for being a jerk when every character is at least a little mean as a baseline except for M&M)
Stolas meanwhile cheated on the wife he was married to for 17 years, blowing up his daughter's life and potentially tanking the family's reputation in the process, then continued to coerce that affair partner into sex in the same house as said daughter, using her inheritance as a bargaining chip in order to do so.
We're supposed to side with Stolas here because of Stella's abuse and his claims he 'tried for so many years to make it comfortable for them and have a family' but with all the other available evidence about the 'family dynamic' we've seen it comes across as hopelessly naive on Stolas' part.
Like what's worse? Blitz who knew he wasn't cut out for commitment and ended things before or right as they were getting serious with all his partners (which isn't an invalid choice if the show wasn't so determined to shame him for not monogamously settling down the minute the option was on the table) or Stolas who let a sham marriage continue for nearly two decades for no good reason, then cheated right before Via was about to become old enough that she could ditch the false domestic scenario he'd tried to conjure up for good, ensuring maximum upset for everyone involved? (And then continued to cheat after the fact by continuing affair that wasn't even a real relationship, it was just Stolas forcing someone into sex so he could playact at having a partner)
All true, and also thank you for mentioning the show's constant shaming of Blitzo's rejection of commitment, because that one's awful.
The only thing Blitzo has ever done wrong is what he did to Verosika, stealing from Stolas, and maybe inviting Stolas to Ozzie's when all he needed was a warm body to get him through the door. He's not a bad person for having one night stands and he's certainly not a bad person for not wanting a relationship with Stolas.
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pong03 · 9 months ago
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Leo kurosagi analysis
this was requested but tumblr wont let me post to their ask so: Okay, Leo is selfish. I'm not gonna deny all the bad things people say about him, or even deny he is a bad person, but he is a GREAT set up for a character. I would like to say that Tokyo debunker is giving set up for growth from each character, Leo is just the most Jarring, for the fan base. full disclosure, I did not like Leo or even consider liking him until I saw the HATE on here, I'm not just trying to be quirky by liking the most disliked character either. I tend to just want to see the good in what most people dislike. I like kpop and I tend to bias the most criticized or least biased members of a group, because I think it's an amazing feeling to give love... Although I understand it's cathartic to hate too, and that's probably why the Leo hate is so strong. I also still don't LIKE Leo, but I really do want to explore his character and I probably will make more posts as we see him more and as I experience him more myself. The Leo cu*king tho, is maybe my least favorite "trope" in TBD fanfic rn... but I don't k*nkshame y'all :*
I also would like to say Sho is his friend, not his victim or Rapunzel. There is some value to Leo in Sho's eyes and I think we shouldn't degrade that because we see that if Sho doesn't like someone he will not engage i.e Ren. Sho is a sweet character and I think he might be friends with Leo because he wants to see the best in him or knows his more repulsive behaviors are a defense mechanism or explained by other reasons we the MC are yet to see. Why I think that is even tho the weird blob guys in the mystery diner suck at making food he still wants to see the best in them, and that very scenario could be a cheeky analogy from the writers themselves, about Sho and Leo. Obviously Leo could be blackmailing Sho, I know that is a commonly held belief, but I do have some perspectives that could debunk that thought. Leo doesn't Garner blackmail on his peers. I think Leo is nosy, and invasive, but he is also incredibly capable, implied by his contributions to the vagastrom group case. If he wanted to figure out who Alan killed he could with his hacking prowess, but instead he asks Mido himself. In invasive ways yes, but he could just have found the information himself, whether by hacking or asking the countless witnesses of the clash. Rather he asks Mido face to face, and, correct me if I'm wrong we can't say he wouldn't have taken no for an answer because Mido just gets mad at his antics and never gives him a straight up no. Again I could be wrong so let me know if Alan does give him a straight no. It's been a while since chapter two for me.
Right now I want to explore some possibilities for his character given the information we have about him ATM. I mentioned above the fact his little nasty, mean, degrading comments could be a defense moreso that he wants people to try and push past that to see if they're viable as his friends. Especially because he is micro-influencer he might be protective of himself because of that. As well as being a chronic liar online he may want to know if he can trust you not to expose him online. I think exploring his past would be amazing because even his stigma makes him seem like an overly cautious person, as well as invasive. Cautious? I feel like its cut and dry that wanting to hear what people say when you aren't around could hint to him being quite anxious about what people think about him. like idk I also feel like the jealousy we see towards Sho might also be more about people finding Sho more approachable. I think because Leo wants to be more involved with people in power he might have not been trying to scare Subaru away because "Sho is mine >:(" and actually could have been jealous that Subaru noticed Sho first and not him. Still awful right? but also like I said I don't see Leo as enjoyable but more so a lot of room for redemption, or explanation. Sympathy or empathy might be something we feel for him a lot if he is properly explored.
Obvs these are just possibilities right :) I actually find him very cute and I like his catty behavior, especially because in comparison to other nasty ghouls he is like a kitten hissing at you, harmless. Like dude Taiga shot me, and you're just a nasty baby, I smell your fear on the inside, you just want to be loved like everyone else. He's a true tsundere and not that "I swear I don't like you!!" shit and I appreciate that. I hope nobody misconstrues this as defense of his toxicity more-so that the point of tokyo debunkers focus seems to be everyone is demonizing these teens who seriously are just teens, and sometimes teenagers are catty are toxic, but they're still learning. Especially when the adults suck too... if not more because they are adults. AND LEO IS HATED FOR BEING STINKY AND MEAN BUT TAIGA AND ROMEO ARE LIKED BUT SO MUCH MORE MORALLY DECREPIT... so idk that especially irks me. I still would like to know what people think and if you are also excited to see the exploration of the ghouls especially Leo, and what theories you may have on him yourself.
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junkdrawerfan · 28 days ago
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So honesty hour I already read this comic but forgot to record my thoughts so we're going to reread and record my thoughts!
And so we continue! Part Three:
First || | Previous || Next
Robin III (1992)
I didn't mention before but this one is titled "The Cry of the Huntress" And I am very excited to meet Huntress and see how she and Tim get along. I've heard she and Timmy have a very brother-sister bantering relationship and I'm here for it!
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She looks so cool! But what is this mask hidding exactly? For real, how does this hide your identity? It whoudl actually be better than robin's if she had the white lenses but right now it's just dumb.
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ARIANNA THERE YOU ARE! I am excited to meet Timmy's first girlfriend (who he cheats on with Steph? Sort of? She kissed Tim without his explicit consent maybe... I am unsure it seems more of a miscommunication trope than anything malicious...Idk I'll have to decide when i get there).
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AH! The Cold War Personified! He does seem like a cool threat and very campy! Perfect!
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If I had a nickle for everytime Tim is introduced to a badass, strong woman who saves his ass and helps him defeat Lynx I would have two nickles. Which isn't a lot but insteresting it's happened twice
But honestly, Huntress is a very fun character for Tim to interact with. Especially because this run involves Tim rebelling (softly) against Bruce by going around him and trying to take down the Russian Mob while Bruce insists Tim wait until he's done investigating. I don't know anything about her yet but she clearly had beef with The Bat.
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So remember how I said Jack Drake is very jealous of Bruce Wayne... Well I guess we're letting go of subtext and going straight for text :D
But honestly Tim really really struggles with the secret identity. In every comic I've read so far with his perspective, he finds the secret identity grating. He is terrible at seperating Robin from his day to day life no matter how hard he tries, gives terrible excusese to duck out of meetings with friends and family even when he would love to stay because he can't help trying to save you, and finds the inability to explain himself infuriating.
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But even then he adores being Robin. He doesn't want to stop being Robin even if it hurts. And knowing what the future will hold (the death of his father, the temporary deaths of his friends and girlfriend, the injuries he will face) it makes his reaction to Damian getting the suit in four years all the more painful.
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WTF is height in comics. Tim is supposed to be a runty 14 yr old! Who is that 5'10 man!
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So Tim is spiraling. The girl he was trying to save was killed by Russian gangsters. And now he's beefing with his dad and snapping at Alfred! I love it!! Perfect! This is the good Tim Whump I'm looking for :D But for reals, his parents, according to a canon comic panel, missed his birthday more than once. Yeah he's not neglected as badly in the comics as he is in fanon but that doesn't change the fact that Tim had very absent parents. GO OFF TIMBO!
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NEVERMIND I AM IN PAIN! TIMBO NO!!! (oh that some good angst tho)
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Woo! Tim just figured out Huntress' real identity. He is too good at this. Plus I love when he brags about how he outsmarted Dick and Bruce as an 8 year old. Tim the ultimate Civilian ID Finder! XD
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yes.
God I love this flavor of Tim Whump!!! Tim you are Robin. Robin is you. You cannot runaway from yourself!!!
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Okay! So Timmers is having a rough time at school. He gets a black eye. He's cutting school to avoid people thinking Bruce Wayne is abusing him. Then he's in the guidance councilor's office before running away and now his dad is like "off to boarding school!" Which I was just starting to feel bad for Jack Drake. It felt like he was trying. But to have him go "Oh my kid is lashing out and struggling so I'm going to ship him off to boarding school!" WILD! That is just a wildly BAD take Jackie Boi.
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Why is Tim convinced Bruce is going to drop him? In Robin II he was nervous if he couldn't defeat the Joker (after less than four months of being Robin!) that Bruce is going to drop him. Now again, Tim is rebelling he is going against Bruce's wishes but why would that be enough for Bruce to drop him? Dick did the same on more than one occassion? I really need to read some more Batman/Detective Comics because clearly there is something going on that I am not getting. Is this just Tim's insecurities or is Bruce's behavior informting this thinking? Has Bruce threatened to take Robin away?
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Alfred's response seems to imply its mostly in Tim's head. Someone give this boy a hug and self confidence. Damn.
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MY SMART BOY! Tim is such a good detective <3 I love him! I love his big brain and awesome internet skills (which by the way this is pre-google and yahoo search engingines so that is very impressive!)
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So I just realized Tim saves Arianna the same way he saves Bernard. A kidnap victim they save from servitude! Its very surface level but still neat! Also I knew she couldn't be dead! :D
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Timmy! You clever boy!!! XD
Side note can't believe this comic predates the European Union!! WILD! Time is a lie!!
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Oh Tim! You poor thing!
ON TO THE NEXT PART! XD
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